Knock knock. Whos there? I am you dumbass im standing right next to you.

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Why did the man eat the turnip greens? Because he was morbidly obese, and needed to maintain a proper diet.

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if you have 5 oranges and 15 ice cubes, how many pancakes can you fit on the roof? red, because aliens dont wear shirts.

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What did the little boy with cancer ask for from the Make a Wish foundation. A cure and to lose his virginity before he dies.

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A blind man jumped out of the way as a car ran through the red light at a one way street.

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no really what are ur names?

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What's the difference between a cow? Trick question—cows eat carrots!

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Whats slower than molasses? Slightly thicker molasses.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm not good at rhyming turd

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A horse walks into a bar and Shits John Taffer is Pissed

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roses are red violets are blue this verse doesn't ryhme and neither does this one

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What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

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Did you hear about the guy that had his entire left side cut off? He's all right now. Dead but all right.

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Why did the little girl fall from the swing? She's got no arms.

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person 1: hey! guess what? person 2: what? person 1: i once saw a brown polar bear

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A guy with cancer walks into a bar... No one treated him any special way, it's not like he had I have cancer written on his forehead.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? Because her mother inadvertently left the gate open while gardening.

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What do you call a black man with a peg leg? Disabled

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Whats worst than finding half a worm in your apple? Getting rapped by a giant scorpian

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Aids, Black People, Cancer, Death, Retarded, Drunk, Sex, Black People, Holocaust, Blackies, White People, BLACK

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What do a helicopter and a banana have in common? They are both edible. Except for the helicopter.

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roses are red tulips are too, violets are violet, not freaking blue.

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Doctor, doctor! I think I've got an ear infection. I best give you some medicine.

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What's worse than being short? Being a Tutsi in 1994.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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