How did little jimmy survive the plane crash? He ate all the survivors, then when the helicopter arrived he ate them too and took the helicopter.

Why are you a chicken? Because I say cock-a-doodle doo

A boy in Bible class was poking a girl in front of him with a pencil. Atfer, maybe ten minutes of this, she was asked "Sarah, what did Eve say to Adam after they had had twenty-seven children" The boy poked her with the pencil again. She stood up, and said "I think we have enough kids Adam."

Why did the white policeman shoot all the black people in a house and not the white people Because the black guys were holding the white guys hostage

ok there is 3 people and the white kid says "bet i got a better dick than all of you" he pulls it out and then the mexican says "nope got you beat" and then the black guy says "nope got all you beat look" and then the mexican and white guys say "its because your black" so the black guy goes home and tells his mom wht happen and ask " is it true mines bigger because im black?" she said " no it bc your 23"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111

How many dead babies can you fit in a child's swimming pool? 9 (Trust me, you won't be able to squeeze the tenth one in there.)

Why did the dog run away from home? Because the owner left the door open.

How Dow you make a baby stop crying?? Hit it with a brick By smash45

knock knock whos there i dont know. go look

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I just sharpened this hatchet Don't make me use it!

How many Dean Mckee's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? He doesn't know what a lightbulb's for, nevermind how to use one.

What did the girl tell her abusive boyfriend Girl: You broke my heart! Boyfriend: I'm gonna break your face.

What do you call something that shoots out a white gooey liquid? A shampoo bottle

why did the chicken cross the road? because he was very hungrey and saw some seed on the other side.

How do you kill Glenn Campbell? Stab him with a screwdriver.

What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing 'cause you done told the b i t c h twice!

What's the difference between Chuck Norris and Bigfoot? Nothing. Their both really hairy.

why is ginger kid so sad? Because his all family was killed

what happened to the man that got shot.... He died.. 3 secs after

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house..... knock knock! whos there? THE CHICKEN!!

Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? No? Well he graduated in four years with a degree in chemical engineering. He worked hard all four years in order to keep his scholarship to the university. Now he leads a very successful life and lives in a large house with his wife and two children.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poetry, Show me your tits.

I sas Ratzinger a sandwich when someone came up to me and said "sharing is caring" So I gave him a grenade He asked "where's the pin" I said " I pulled it for you" This is not an anti joke

What happened when Tim's house caught on fire? The fire department was contacted and they put the fire out.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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