David: Hey Bill. Do you know what the most common place for a Democrat to work is? Bill: No. David: An insane Asylum, so they can be with their friends and family. David: Do you know what the most common place for a black person to work is? Bill: No. David: A prison, so they can be with their friends and family. David: Do you know what the most common place for a 20th centrury undercover German Jew to work is? Bill: No. David: A morge, so they can be with their friends and family. David: Do you know what the most common place for a Scientologist to work is? Bill: No. David: With Democrats. (Writen by Ben, avid Anti-Scienctologist)

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Boy:U a dime Girl: she said ur a quarter Boy:-_- dumb B***h

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Jesse uses a prescription shampoo called " greasey poop" because he feels like his hair doesnt look greasy enough. He cries himself asleep every night because he wants a slim body like the rest of the cool kids, so he eats his pain away, which digs him an even deeper hole. the life of Jesse zigenbein is quite tragic to say the least. Please donate 10$ to the "eat ourselves to sleep" campaign

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There once was a beautiful princess named Snow White who lived with seven dwarves in the forest. One day, and old hag approached her and offered her an apple. She bit into the apple, chewed, and said,"Wow, that's tasty. Is this a Golden Delicious?" The hag said, "Why yes, it is. I have a private orchard. Perhaps I'll let you see it some time." The two promptly resumed their lives.

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What do you say to a black man driving a car? Taxi

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What did the Mexican firefighter name his twin sons? Nothing, his wife had an abortion.

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Why did the midget cross the road? He needed to buy a ladder

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Why am I constipated? I ate fiber glass insulation.

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knock knock? who's there.......... MEEEE :D hehe

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What did the homosexual farmer say when he answered the phone? Hello

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Why was Joe lying on the ground? Because he got shot.

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What did the fish say when he ran into a cement wall? ....Nothing fish don't run What did the fish say when he swam into a cement wall? ...Damn

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How many retards does it take to screw in a lightbulb? No number of them could figure it out. They sit in the dark for hours, scared of the monsters.

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why wuz 6 afraid of 7 7 had a gun

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A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

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Whats the difference of how a hot blonde and an ugly red head got in to the same collage with a sex addicted dean? Nothing they were both very smart inteligent women with respectables GPA

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why did little suzy fall off the swing? she was stabbed by a drugaddict

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What's worse than 50 dead babies stapled to trees? 47 dead babies stapled to trees (it's better if it's a nice, round number.)

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Why did the officer arrest the black man? Because he suspected him of littering. ...and because he was black.

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Three blokes walk into a pub. One of them is a little bit stupid, and the whole scene unfolds with a tedious inevitability

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What's worse than finding out your friend is gay? Being gang-raped.

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Mary had a little lamb, The nurse and midwife fainted. Because last year she met a ram, And they got too acquainted.

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What is a six letter word for cactus? Cactus

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Who is fat, stupid and pretty dam ugly? (hint: look in mirror)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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