What's black an white and red all over? Two dead babies, one African American and one Caucasian split in half by a chainsaw.

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A: Do you want to hear a joke? B: A ladie not working in the kitchen A: WTF dude thats just terrible

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer left the gait open.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

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An older man and a young boy are holding hands and walking into the woods together. The boy looks up and say, "gee, I'm scared, it's dark in there." the old man answers, "Yeah, just think how I feel....I have to walk out of here alone!"

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In soviet Russia...things are different

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how do you make a plummer cry? you spell PLUMBER wrong

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who is really lanky? james cornish

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Whats the difference between obama and Michael Jackson? Michael Jackson Is dead

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead

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i'm not random but cheese does get a bit purple if you leave it in your laptop then the battery dies and the sun expands and kills every dodo alive even though they're extinct but that not the point

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Don't chop the dinosaur daddy! OK.

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Hey, what do you call an absent-minded person? I'm sorry what did you say?

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A girl asks a Croatian bartender for a beer, the bartender replies, 'There is no beer in this bar.'

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How do you eat an Elephant? Elephant meat is most palatable after roasting in a 450 degree oven for 2 hours. Garnish with carrots and broccoli.

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Q: What do you call a stop sign in the winter? A: A stop sign in the winter.

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Guess my favourite fruit. Peach.

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Why do thieves shower before undertaking a robbery? Probably part of their morning routine.

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What is the difference between a blond and a mummy? A blond has a brain.

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Knock knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who? Doctor Adams. You called me about your father's stroke.

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My girlfriend is getting an abortion tonight. Its a surprise.

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Q: What do you call a Jew in space? A: An astronaut you racist bastard!

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Why did the communist fail his history class? Because he didn't study hard enough.

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It was the week of the school formal and a girl rang up her date and said I don't have a dress for the formal. He said ok the lets go out and buy one. So they went to the dress shop to buy one but the line was really, really long so they waited in the dress line for ages and ages until they finally got to the front, paid and walked out. As they did, the girl said well I suppose you need a suit, so they went to the suit shop, and again, the suit line was really long but they waited in the suit line and they finally got to the front, paid and walked out. Then the guy said, well if we want to go to the formal in style, then we will need a limo. So they went to the limo shop but the limo line was really long as well. But again, they waited in the limo line and they got to the front, paid and left. It was finally the night of the formal, she had her dress, he had his suit and they arrived in their limo. Everyone was having a great time and the the girl said to her partner, I'm a bit thirsty could you please get me a drink? So the guy went over to the drinks table and went to get a glass of punch but there was no punch line.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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