Simon says why the hell are we playing Simon say!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

What's weird about four black men in a toilet? No one got shot.

In a joke book: So a man walks into a bar. Suddenlly the universe around the author crack. Unable to sustain the infinite potential of punchlines, the author tumbles through an empty void amongst shards of his broken reality.

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DEAD ON KANE ITS BEEN ALL YOU ABD CAOIMHIN

How did the seal die? It went clubbing ... Then overdosed on ecstasy, it was very sad.

Everyone text/call Mrs. Butt Hemingworth for a free pint of her delicious marmalade! Serious inquirers only. 832 704 1331

Q. What do you call a bashed black man laying on pavement? A. Neapolitan

XD That one was awesome Nero, for a moment I was really wondering if you refer towards a tough guy as yourself as a boy. Now you pretty lucky I like tough guys, and you always have a savage joke at hand don't you?

Why was the boy in front of the adoption center sad? He lost his lolly-pop.

What do a porkchop and a watermelon have in common? They're both edible, organic, and delicious. Also, both are fun to throw at people.

What did George Bush say when 9/11 happened? "Silly pilots! The airport isn't in a building!"

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

Why are black people afraid of lawn mowers? Because whenever you start it, it says run nigga nigga.

To momma's missing so many teeth it looks like her tongues in jail

How do you knock a cat out of a tree? If that doesn't work, use a lethal BB gun

once opon a time. never mind i'm just going to beat you kids.

What do you call a joke book without a title? A joke book!!!!

What is the difference between a white gut and a black guy? The level of melanin in their skin.

What did the lighthouse say to the tree? Nothing because they are both unatimate objects and cannot speak

Bill Clinton, George Bush, and Barak Obama all found a magical lamp. The Genie appeared and said, "I will grant one wish for all of you, and one wish only." Bill wished to become president. The other two thought that would be pretty cool and did the same. (ic3)

What do you call a black man that can steal, shoot, and jump? A basketball player.

What did the homeless man say to his family? Nothing. His family left him after he lost his job.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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