When Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked the world, He broke his foot because every human being that kicks such a solid structure would break their foot.

A blond, a brunette, and a redhead are best friends and go shopping together.

Evil Witch: Hey Snow White, want an apple. Snow White: No thank you, I just ate, I'm good. Evil Witch: But its good! Snow White: No thanks, I'm good! Evil Witch: Ill put caramel on it!! Snow White: NO THANKS! Evil Witch: FINE!! The Evil Witch then pulled out an AK - 47 and violently murdered Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.

why did the clown cross the road? to kill everyone in the dark knight midnight premiere

Whats worse than stubbing your toe? Sandy hook

Its over 9000 penises and they're all raping little children!!!!!

What's old, silver, and smells like old cheese? A fork with old cheese on it.

What is Hellen Keller's favorite movie? Around the block in 80 days.

what are you talking about. Nets are terrible. Lakers are going to be the best.

Why did the duck cross road? It didn't, it got ran over.

A priest a rapist and a child molester walk into a bar. He orders a drink

Knock knock Whos there your son your son who holy shit dad just let me in

Joke: two polar bears were in a bath tub. One said "pass the soap." And the other one said "no soap, radio!"

Why did the hippo drink the water? Because it was thirsty

Why do girls think they deserve the very best? Because if an ugly girl in twilight can find a hunky vampire and ripped werewolf why can't they. And let's not forget those crappy Disney princess movies.

What did the dog say to the tree? Bark.

Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was tired of this joke.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

Why are babies like shake weights? Cause If you shake them long enough, they both end up being inanimate objects.

What did the dead woman say to the murderer nothing dead people cant talk

whats fun,atracks children and says wrape van on it my van i lied about it being fun

What do a porkchop and a watermelon have in common? They're both edible, organic, and delicious. Also, both are fun to throw at people.

Whats white, fat, and looks like a horse? An albino horse who apparently has a high chance of diabetes.

Whats alive and drowning? your new born baby you just threw in the river

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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