So you are "The Nero" are you not? How ironic... ...I got nothing on you, let me ask you however, why did you quit the underground society? What changed your lifestyle so much? I mean I accept that you did not do it out of fear or cowardice, but why did you leave it up to the rest of us to try to hold together the last remains of freedom and social information? What? To use your techniques in order to entrance people into buying your books? How is that so different? I am not saying that I consider your methods lesser, because nobody here does, but if you can explain how this makes you better, I would appreciate it, I am certain that most people would.

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Panda walks into a restaurant with gun ready to eat, shoot and leave to finish a really good grammar joke, but before he can eat, Animal Control tranquilize him and seize his gun. So all he can do is leave unconscious. Meanwhile someone takes enjoyment in slowly burning the dictionary entry for "Panda".

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Text this number just cuz 16305208722

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Q. What happened to the women who cut her finger? A. she got staff infection and died.

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Yo' Mama is so fat, her driver's license says, "picture continued on other side."

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why are there so many peadofiles in the world? sexy kids.

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What do you call a black man in church? Religious

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Q: How many Jewish people can fit in a four door sedan? A: 4, or possibly 5, depending on the sedan's optional seating, and depending on whether the gentleman are comfortable enough with each other to scoot closer to allow a 5th friend to join in.

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why barack obama sad he realized the 4 trillion dollars of debt wasn't going be solved by borrowing more money

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Knock knock! Who's there? Alan okay come in

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My dog dumps in my house she looks at me and says rut row

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What's worse than burning your tongue drinking hot chocolate? Being shanked by a homeless man.

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How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

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I just started the seafood diet. It consists primarily of eating fish due to its high nutritional content.

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Why does Chuck Norris always know the time? He bought a fancy new watch.

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What did the black man eat at a picnic? I don't know, I wasn't there.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? George. George who? Oh sorry, I thought this was number 52. my mistake.

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You know what's worse than having friends with a lake houses Not being invited to their lake house...

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What did the squirrel say to Justin Bieber? We both enjoy nuts.

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An optimistic person says the glass is half full Pessimistic people say the glass is half empty Engineers say the glass is 2 times the size it needs to be.

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What did Billy get his dad for Father's day? Nothing, his dad was killed by a spinning helicopter blade when Billy was 3.

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Why did the Mexican man grow a mustache? It wasn't his choice. Men naturally grow facial hair and he ran out of razors.

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Why couldn't Timmy enjoy his ice cream? His lips were sewn together by an evil seamstress who was mad that he stole all of her Pop-Tarts

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Why do you call a person who spits in your cheeseburger? A mean person

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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