What time is it when you run out of ice cream? Time to get more ice cream.

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Who row's? •Liam Findlay

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What animal wouldn't you want to play games with? Probably none of them. They are animals and incapable of playing board games.

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Why don't dinosaurs talk? Because they're dead.

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How do you stop a baby from crawling in circles? Pick it up and put it in a crib, like a responsible parent.

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Why is five afraid of six? Because six seven eight. (Note: The language of numbers is Subject-Object-Verb, rather than Subject-Verb-Object like English.)

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What is worse than braking a fingernail, Learing that a clown raped your entire family

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Why are black people like trees? Because they fall down if you hit them multiple times with an axe.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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what is like a duck and quacks ? A duck.

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What does a banana and a helicopter have in common? Neither of them are a police officer.

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Why couldn't the man walk? He lost his legs when he stepped on a land mine in Afghanistan.

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knock knock who is there who who who your an owl

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Whats the difference between a kangaroo and a kangeroot ? Ones a marsupial. The others a Geordie stuck in a lift.

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people say i have big feet but you know what the say about people with big feet? :) big socks. sl

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How do you make a clown stop smiling? hit him with an axe

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What's black and white and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

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Why did the African boy die? He was denied any antibiotics to heal his severe case of mono and AIDS, and was living on dirty water and dirt.

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Why does austin bell like it up the butt? Cause he's a cat a kitty cat meow meow meow and meow meow meow

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A black, white, Asian, and Mexican are walking down the street. This is showing a good diverse community.

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why'd the chicken cross the road It didn't, it was safely placed inside a chook house

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What's oily and smells like smegma? Kevin Crummy

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What do you call a man with a Club approaching a Seal Very Strong considering he can hold a building

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops