What do you get when you cross a Lion and a Shark? You would likely get trouble, seeing as its both animals are quite dangerous and crossing even one of them is ill advised.

A kid asks his mom: "Mom, what would I be when I grow up?" And so his mother answers: "You won't grow up, you have cancer"

Hollywood presents: In a world... Where darkness and crime is at every corner... The governments darkest secret... MUST... BE... UNLEASHED! Jack Kirby: So, with this technology I can swallow criminals and gain their abilities? But is there not a lot wrong with this? Hollywood: Meh... Sorry, we are gonna go with The Fast and The Furious 64: Mario Kart style.

Women.

whats bad about being black and jewish they have to sit in the back of the oven

The people who posted those extremely long "jokes" down there have no life.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is both deaf and blind. Driving would be an extremely hazardous action for herself and other nearby drivers.

why did the blue berry cross the road

Haiku's are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Refrigorator

A black and a white walk into a bar, d.r. King would be proud.

Why did the wolf cry boy? Cause he was a pedifile.

Q: Whats worse then a minor fender bender? A: Dieing a long painful death by getting stabbed 27 times then getting hit by a car 2 hours later your brother finds you and told you that him and your wife have been cheating on you and your kid is his.

When there's something strange in your neighborhood, who ya gonna call? The Police. There's something strange in your neighborhood.

I once saw a fat child eating a sandwich. I wondered what was inside.

Why did Hitler shoot himself He saw his his gas bill

A Rabi, a priest, and a monk all go to different churches because they all have different beliefs an respect each others decisions.

What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

A man crawled up to a water fountain but fell because he had no legs

why did the man fall off his unicycle? because he was dead

Jacob Mckeand licks his gooch everynight. Some nights he even covers it in maple syrup. 'mmmmm' he thinks to himself as he licks his 7 inch gooch up and down.

A man is walking on the beach and notices a shiny brass lamp on the ground. He picks it up, polishes it and then sells it for a reasonable amount of money at a local pawnbroker.

What's worse than missing your flight? Realizing that everyone who got on it died from a bomb

How many electricians does it take to change a lightbulb? No seriously, I don't know because we've only just got electricity in our village.

Why was the poor man poor? Because he doesnt make money

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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