Why did sally fall out of the tree? Because sally was morbidly obese and uprooted the tree from underneath her subsequently causing her to splash violently on the ground. Why didn't sally get back up? Because the splash caused the earth to spin at 40000 rpm into the sun.

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Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

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why is stu taking so long to post a joke because he is autistic

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Once a upon of time, cow said chicken go cluck. Years later, mustard was like a ketchup. I said it was good. Oh yea baby. It was a good day.

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Is that a banana in your pocket, or do you just have an erection?

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Why did billy have a frog stapled to his face? Because he was having a bad day.

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What does it mean when people say your mom? it means that there name is Hunter

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Why did the soccer player miss practice? He got shot in the face.

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What did the Asian get on his math assignment? 56%, he forgot about it and passed it in a day late with a number of questions uncompleted.

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Cancer.

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? reading posts on this website that arent antijokes. Seriously poeople... you cant just say something that random than put something tragic. it has to be funny and tragic.

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whats the difference between a brick wall and a jew? jews wear yamakas

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whats big red and eats bricks a big red brick eater

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What do you get when you cross two things that are seemingly unrelated? A play on words.

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Why am I constipated? I ate fiber glass insulation.

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What do you call a terrible Therapist that shoots coke up his nose? Sickman, Sickman Fraud.

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What happened to the Jew who went to France? He had a very enjoyable time and visited many of the remarkable landmarks around the country.

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How did the guy who's been in his mothers basement for 20 years lose his virginity? He didn't, that's where his mother hid his body.

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What's a lil plus a lot A little more then a lot

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What is the best part about being a rapist? The orgasms.

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What do Justin Bieber and corn have in common? They are both fruits. Except for the corn.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a serial-rapist with links to the Black Dragon triad. Yee.

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A horse walks into a bar. He politely holds the door for a young woman.

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Whats worse than 2 babies in a trashcan. 1 baby in 2 trashcans

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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