Q. Why did the little girl drop her ice cream? A. She dropped it as she got into the van

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What do accountants do when they're constipated? Take a laxative and eat plenty of fiber.

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What do you call a white hankerchief dipped into the red sea? Wet.

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Why did the pig cross the road? To chase after his adopted chicken.

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What do you a call a black man in a two piece suit? A respectable citizen, racial profiling is ignorant.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? about 900 pounds

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Why did the vulture cross the road? To get to the pile of dead babies left over from the Holocaust.

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a black man walks out of popeyes

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What is terrible and doesn't exist? This joke's punchline,

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Q: How many hair styles do celebreties induce annualy? A: I have no clue but I'm pretty sure that's a midget defacing your house!

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Tourette's, Cheese on toast.

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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Why did Billy fall off his bike? He tried to kill himself.

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what happened to the slut last time she opened her legs. a bee flew in and stung her. turned out she was deathly allergic. she died a painful death.

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Why did the boy eat the chips? Because he was hungry

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what did the red rock say to the blue rock? Nothing. Rocks can't talk.

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how many baby's does it take to paint a wall?? depends how hard u throw them

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whats worst then antijokes? the holocaust

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Oh NOES! She does worry about me! YOU MUST APOLOGIZE! Relax, the body has two sources of happy drugs, one is the sweet calm stuff I am really bad at, and the other comes with adrenaline and stuff, the name of which I do not remember, both are important, but yeah, I am a thrill seeker, and when I do not find them, I make a thrill out of whatever I got, whatever that means.

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Two kiwis are in a fridge. Suddenly, the door opens, and one of them is pulled out by a human hand. He was never to be seen again.

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Whats so funny about the women bringing fast food home for her family? Nothing shes a single mother who does'nt have time to make food between her two jobs.

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what happens when you put Rihanna and Chris brown in the same room? Rihanna dies

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Why do black people like fried chicken? Well you see....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops