what is red, white, and spins around real fast? a baby in a washing machine

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A woman says Renae has a butt... Two men say we don't care we have her hammer. True story.

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What do you call a jewish womans boobs? JUBES!

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Get on the boat.

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what did the left eye say to the right eye? "eye" see you

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? A teenage girl was texting and driving, didn't see it, and now it's roadkill.

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Why did the chicken cross the road. grass was greener on the other side!

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why did the plane crash ? Because a loaf of brad was flying it, and Loaves of bread don't fly planes

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: Depends on how hard you throw them.

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Time flies an arrow. Fruit flies like banana.

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How do you get Helen Keller to keep a secret? You politely ask her not to tell anyone.

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Why doesn't God answer prayers? God does answer prayers, but He does not want you to have everything you want just by asking it, He wants you to work for what you have, everything happens for a reason. ... Nah, it's because God does not exist.

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Chuck Norris was so good at karate that he held the middle weight world title for 6 years and was named fighter of the year by Black Belt Magazine. He also used his talents to start a successful acting and advertising career.

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A man walks into a bar. Sup.

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what did the captcha response say to the man? ofdorno which.

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My left foot has 6 toes, my right face has 8 Q-tips -Matt

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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The average man ejaculates at 40mph, which is why its safer to hit a child at 30mph

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BRANDON LUI ROCKSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

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I have a dig bick You that read wrong You read that wrong too You read that again to make sure I'm not fucking with you

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In the North people say "once upon a time." What do people in the South say? "Y'all never gonna believe dis shit!"

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what did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas Cancer

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You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society

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Girlfriend: OMG! what could be worst than you cheating on me? Holocaust

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops