What did one penguin say to the other Nothing, penguins don't talk.

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You can teach a man to fish but you cant teach a fish to man

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because there happened to be road in the vicinity of the fowl and the odds of the bird crossing it is very high.

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Why did sally drop her ice cream? She got hit by an 18 wheeler Knock knock Whos there not sally

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Q:Why didn't the Mexican get out of the box? A:Because he liked it in the box.

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Beethoven! It is true? Did you really lose your hearing? Yes.

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What did the giraffe say to the other giraffe. Nothing, giraffes are animals and thus cannot speak

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead get pulled over. The cop says "Yuck!" Then shoots the redhead because red hair is disgusting.

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Ron Paul for President!

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Why did Helen Keller cross the road? Hoefuwpugosihfioapfsoihosw[

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Why did Hitler hate Jews? Because he use to get bulied by them when he was in high school.

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What's the worst part about a plane with 500 people in it crashing? It might leave a dent in the ground.

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This girl came up to me and said she recognized me from the vegetarian club. Her name was Jill.

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Whats worse than 1 bee sting? 2 bee stings? whats worse than 2 bee stings? 3 bee stings? No! The holicost Whats worse than the holicost? What? 3 Bee stings

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YO MAMMA SO SKINNY SHE HULA-HOOP THIER A CHEERIO

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side XD

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find the o 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duh its up top

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Facilitator huh? Sounds like someone that kills someone standing in the way, or bribes off others.

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If I was, yet this syndicate was a legal one, necessary in order to maintain world peace trough the means of economical stability and such, would this be acceptable to you? Hypothetically of course.

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Roses are bald Violets are bald You are bald I think you have cancer.

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What do you call a cat with a pop tart for a body and rainbows flying out of its butt? Nyan Cat

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A deaf man walks into a bar. A few minutes later, cops come in and takes the poor man into the cop car and takes him downtown to the precinct for booking. Meanwhile, back in the bar the deaf man drinks his beer and converses with the bartender in sign language.

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Q: How do you make a five year cry twice? A: There are many ways, as children are generally not that adept at controlling their emotions. Loud noises, threats of violence, images of scary monsters... those tend to work. Be sure to let them stop crying before making them cry again, otherwise you will have only made them cry once.

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too bad about that wild ball, you otherwise played a fantastic softball game

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops