Roses are red, Violets are microwaves, I have amnesia, Roses are red.

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So the word RAPING does not work unless you type it in caps? Raping... Did it censor? No? Never mind then... Wow, catchphra Never mind... Its a sign X-files theme.... Teleports at your house: Hah bitch never you ugly, or not ugly enough... Urgh, nevermind, I mean some ugly chicks know their stuff but you know... Anyway NeroMetal The sociopath not the fucking Cultist piece of shit that use my morals as a code system? YOU THINK WE THE SAME? EEEEEEH! Me raping you says we are not... And ill find you ;) Or your sister or your mom, I mean h0m0? You think im a pervert or something?

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how do you make a plumber sad? tell him to pull up his pants

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2 moose sitting in a tree, suddenly there came a boat and landed in the tree next to them, then said one of the moose, he probably lives there

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Knock Knock Who's there? My foot. My foot who? My foot in your ass.

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Who is green? Mike Wazowsky.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, come at me again and I'll punch you

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Blonde: Where's the ice? Asian: In the freezer.

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We could have had it all Rolling in the deep You have my heart inside of your hand As you've just now inexplicably ripped it out of my ribcage.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

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Why didn't the Mother packed her son's lunch? Because her son Timmy likes to go to the canteen

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A Muslim, a Jew and a Christian are on an airplane talking about religion. The Jew tells the Christian he believes in a single holy entity. The Christian says he believe Christ is the Son of that very same entity. The Muslim says "When can I get out of this room?" because he's been detained at the airport due to religious profiling.

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Once there was a pig named Poga. When he grew up, he was slaughtered and made into bacon.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Sally. I don't know anyone by that name, please go away.

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What`s the difference between a dead baby and a pencil? I don`t keep a pencil in my backpack

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How do you torture helen keller? Waterboard her.

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Why did the man laugh? Because humans laugh when they hear a joke.

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Your momma is so ugly that when she stepped on the mirror, it broke.

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Whats worse than a baby stapled to a tree? Holocaust

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Why couldn't the man stop dancing? Because he had Parkinson's.

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Why did the girl cry? i took her happy meal.

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How do you blindfold a Chinese man? With a blindfold.

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When writing haikus Sometimes, I miscount the syllables See, that line has eight.

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What's the difference between jokes and anti-jokes? Anti-jokes aren't funny.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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