How do you get a clown off a swing? Take a chainsaw and cut the swing in half

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Roses are red, violets blue, um... that's all i got.

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Jamie Oliver eats a chip

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Ms Leong Sux

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What do you call a person that smells like shite and chases uglier girls than him? .. . . . . . . .. . . . . . Smelly McD the smelly cunt

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nickel back

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my boloney has a first name its OSCAR, my boloney has a last name its MEYER.. now bend over son while i shove my boloney in ur butt!

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What did the Asian say to the American? herro. rook at me. i have round eye i american!

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Have you heard of the dog that sounds like Megan fox? No Oh, well ummm apperantally there's this ummm dog that sounds like Megan fox. So ummm yeah. Pretty interesting stuff

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What's sad about four children going over a cliff in a car ? Four children just went over a cliff in a car.

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why did the dog went inside the church? because the door was open.

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What did the pig do when the farmer died? He just stood there cause pigs are stupid.

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Q: Whats worse then a minor fender bender? A: Dieing a long painful death by getting stabbed 27 times then getting hit by a car 2 hours later your brother finds you and told you that him and your wife have been cheating on you and your kid is his.

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What is long, hard, and full of semen? An erected penis.

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Person 1: what is 2 + 2? Person 2: 4 Person 1: no Person 2: what is it than? Person 1: vagina

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Have you heard of that new jewish car? No, have you? No.

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Why couldnt Helen Keller drive? Because She was Blind you sexist asshole

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A girl is talking with her boyfriend - God, you're selfish!!! - No, i sell meat.

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why did the zebra cross the road?

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Why was the Tortous and the Hare written? So fat people will feel good about themselves.

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Q: What say one therapist to a friend? A: I'm the rapist

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Gullible is not in the dictionary Yes it is

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Life is like a bucket of wood shavings. Except when they're in a pail. Then it's like a pail of wood shavings.

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you know your just like my pinkie toe........eventually i am going to bang you on a table

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops