Roses are red Violets are blue Your window is open I'm watching you

Why was the baby crying? Because it was on fire.

Roses are brown Violets are brown Who pooped in my garden?

Q: Why did the Westboro Baptist Church picket the gay marine’s funeral? A: Homosexuals are a plague sent by Satan to destroy the fabric of America.

Seven monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and broke its head! Momma called the doctor, And the doctor said, "I'm sorry, Mrs.Monkey, but your son has suffered a severe concussion, and will be very mentally impaired for the rest of his life."

Why did the frog die? Because I stapled it onto a boy's face.

Whais red and bad for your teeth? a brick

Have you ever tripped over a leaf? No. Neither have I.

Why did Sara fall off the swing? Because she had no arms... Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sara.

Q: What do you call a cow with no legs? A: Lunch.

Q. have you seen Helen Keller house A. niether has she

A woman stopped making sandwiches.

What's worse than stubbing your toe? Slavery.

A blonde, a redhead and a brunette were on an island. There were loads of other people too - the UK is a pretty popular place to live.

What is the difference between my dog and my girlfriend? I love my dog

What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? The lawyer is a human being whose profession is to give legal advice and assistance to clients and represent them in court or in other legal matters while the catfish is a freshwater or marine fish with whiskerlike barbels around the mouth, typically bottom-dwelling. -BG_Shank_A

One time, as a dare, John was forced to eat 5 king size chocolate bars, 3 cakes, 8 Oreo Milkshakes, and 7 packages of Krispy Kreme Donuts. As a result, John has diabetes.

what worse than bitting into an apple and finding a worm bitting into a worm and finding an apple

Hi... your father has testicular cancer and he will die in 2 months....

Why'd the guy fall off the building? I pushed him

Knock,Knock Who's there? The Police, Your under arrest for urinating on a toliet.

a black man walks into a shop, he buys his groceries, then leaves...

Person 1: What do you get when you cross a cow and your mom? Person 2: What? Person 1: A cow that looks like your mom

What do you call an giraffe? Well, you should probably call it a giraffe if you want people to think you are literate and know your grammar.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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