Q. How many alzhimers patients dose it take to screw in a light bulb? A. To get to the other side

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A man jumped off a 30 story building. What did he learn? Nothing. He died instatly when he hit the ground.

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Parents were talking about a particular whore house and tries to keep it secret to their son. Father: Bob and I saw the house near the river, its a whore house full of prostitutes. Mother: Shhh! Our son is listening. The Son enters the room. Son: Don't mind me, I know that area. Both parents were angry: So you've been there!? Don't deny, you know! Son: Just because I know doesn't mean I've been there. I know the moon has less gravity but I haven't been there.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? This joke.

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Shltskc gw? G

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Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black. I am blind.

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My Nan, that is all.

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A man walks into a bar and orders 12 shots. "8?" Asks the bartender, to verify he had heard correctly. He feels unsure of giving the man 12 shots but does so anyways due to his financial situation and he hopes for a generous tip. Afterwards, the man kills 9 people in a car crash due to his level of intoxication and the bartender seeps into depression due to his feeling of guilt.

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I wish there were a city named Sample. So that the sign can say "Urine Sample"

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Why is the moon gray? Why is it not?

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your momma is so poor that she is on welfare.

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Wow you look beautiful in that picture..... Let me see your tits. Sorry, I thought I was still texting.

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I know how to make a brilliant telescope out of an empty jar, some leather, a string and a brilliant telescope.

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Who enslaves small people and forces them to work in his factory all year round in ridiculous outfits. Santa

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What is the difference between a black man and a bench? The bench is a piece of wood, while the black man is a human being.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Wanna buy some meth.

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"I see." said the blind man to his deaf son.

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What's the best sound in the world? Children screaming

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A rapist, black guy, and a homophob walk into a bar and the bartender says nice game last night kobe.

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Tom: Knock knock! Guy: Who's there? Tom: Carrot. Guy: Impossible.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool? Phil, because that's his name.

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Why does tundes food suck? Because he is from Africa and the cuisine is different

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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What do you call a yelling, enraged Asian man? A fucking asshole.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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