What do you get when you cross a Dachshund and a Nazi? Bestiality. Ew.

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Your playing NBA 2k12 and some one steals the man your covering and you scream "THAT'S MY MAN!" what sounds wrong in this situation?

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Why did the young boy die from Aggressive cancer? ...Because there isn't a cure.

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how many members of the australian greens party does it take to write legislation? none, it's already been done for them by Karl Marx

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How do you stop a baby from drowning? Take your foot off its neck.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? The Holocaust

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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Knock knock Who's there Joe Aids who's?

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What's worse than a tree getting cut down? This joke.

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"Why can't you hear pterodactyl when it goes to the bathroom?" "Because the pee is silent?" "No, because they are dead, you idiot."

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What happens when an alien touches fire? It gets burnt

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A momma tomato and a baby tomato are walking down the street, and the baby tomato starts to fall behind. The mother turns to it and says "hurry up."

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Why did the man shoot himself? Because he already shot his wife.

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What is the difference between a mallard with a cold and you? One is a sick duck I forget how this ends, but your mother is a whore.

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Whats the difference between a watermelon and babies I don't have a pile of dead watermelon in my basement

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CAS

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What do you call a woman who is addicted to crack, has a light mustache and huge saggy tits, has had 4 kids with 4 different fathers and makes her living giving hand-jobs behind the bus station? Mom.

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I don't always browse the internet. But when i do i prefer Anti Joke.con

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how many drunk drivers does it take to drive home one and only one, if more than one drunk driver tried to drive home at the same time in the same car they would surely crash and not make it home.

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What did God say to the priest while he was masturbating.... ... God doesn't exist.

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What did the robot say to the child? Nothing, he malfunctioned and strangled him. Despite the authorities best efforts to free the kid, he was still strangled because robots are really strong. After killing the boy, the robot self destructed and leveled 5 city blocks everyone within the vicinity was killed.

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What do you call a white sheep with no legs? A cloud What do you call a black sheep with no legs? A shit.

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What's white and smells like crap? An albino tird. Just kidding, Justin Biebers music.

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everyone dislike the first joke on page one

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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