How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. Mice don't have the strength required to do that.

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What noise does a Chinese roller coaster make? Chink Chink Chink Chink chink.....

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, Or so the tell me, Because I'm Blind

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bob lost his camouflage bag. he never found it.

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Why did the black man kill himself? Because he had a very serious case of depression brought on by his recent divorce

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What did the Elephant say the other Elephant? We do not know. Their vocalization is still a mystery to us.

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Why did Susie drop her ice cream? She was hit by a bus. Knock knock Who's there? Not Susie.

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What do you get if you mix rice with slightly different flavoured rice? Rice.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Hitler... Time to go to Aushcwitz

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Hats better than a stick? A stone

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't, a car ran him over.

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How many Mexicans does it take to cross the border? Don't answer, just think and laugh.

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Your momma's so fat, she has just been diagnosed with Chronic renal failure.

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Parents who drive with children on their lap should be wrapped with a huge diapper

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A boy with one arm walks into a rock climbing facility and quickly realizes that his dream of being a rock climber is impossible because he is blind.

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69

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The word you are looking for is charm, not seduction, I am above such things, and while I have no reason whatsoever to believe either one of us can gain anything from going "eye for an eye", I am sure I can offer whatever financial and even specialized assistance you might require in order to get that eye of yours seeing clearer than before... Worry not, I shall outlaw the name Nero and all the derivations and similarities from my Order, unless someone named Nero actually happens to come by of course...

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whats worse than watching your house burn to the ground? Sarah Palin becoming president

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A elderly man was driving down the freeway when he got a call from his wife. He answered the phone and his wife said "Be careful dear, I just heard on the news that someone is driving the wrong way on the freeway." The wife then heard a loud crash over the phone as the drunk driver going the wrong way slammed head first into her husbands car, killing them both intstantly.

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Q: What do you say to someone who makes fun of you and is bigger than you? A: Nothing, you just punch him in the toe and run away

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What are crabs with out the crabs Nothing hahahahaha

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Why was Jimmy so bad at jumping rope? His father's car ran over an IED back in 2009. Jimmy had lost his legs in a tragic explosion.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops