My uncle said to me that life is like a box of chocolates But I'm lactose intolerant

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Doesn't matter, had sex. Except for the STD's I possibly contracted.

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What could be worse than a giant paint bubble? The Holocaust.

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Why is this the best day of 10 year old Johnny's life? His parents were killed in 9/11, and Osama Bin Laden has been found and killed. What, Too soon?

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What's the worst place to land when parachuting off an airplane? A. In the middle of an ocean B. In a war zone C. Inside an active volcano D. In a justin beiber concert

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Q: whats worse than finding a worm in your apple A: the holocaust

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Why did the Italian family have spaghetti for dinner? Thats the only thing they had in the house

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Q: What did zero say to the eight? A: Nice belt

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Why did the girl fall of the swings? Because she has no arms.

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Why couldn't the teen go to the prom? He was busy working to help his mom recover from breast cancer.

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A man approaches an attractive young woman at a party. He asks her if a rag smells like chloroform and proceeds to hold the rag up to her face. She passes out, the man takes her into a nearby bedroom and rapes her. He casually leaves the party. He will most likely continue this vile act for years to come.

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Guess what? You guessed it.

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What's sad about 2 black men driving off a cliff? They were my friends.....

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Boy: Doctor! Doctor! I can't see my legs Doctor: It's because you're blind son

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A black guy and a white guy are walking down the sidewalk. As it suddenly begins to rain, what does the white guy say to the black guy? Nothing. They did not know each other.

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Major League Soccer

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How you know when dislextic

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What do you do if you walk outside and see your t.v. floating in the lawn in the middle of the night? Go back inside.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To meet up with his friend that was on the other side.

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Soccer...

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I got a new jacket. The jacket had real cotton inside the sleeves. The next day my new jacket was gone, but the one i bought yesterday wasn't.

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What happened when the car hit the man? He died.

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I'm sn otter

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A mermaid found a magic lamp at the bottom of the ocean. She rubbed it and a cat with 9 lives came out so he didn't drown.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops