What do you call a horse that likes to box? A horse

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A man with tourettes walks into a bar, due to his disease he shouts unexpected profanities across the room; everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the pressure anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom and pulls out a gun and points it at his head. HIs wife of 15 years walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to conceive. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man diagnosed with touretts then goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. After he killed everybody he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentanced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man with touretts still cannot control his ticks and rots in jail everyday screaming obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the gay guys house Knock Knock Who's there? The chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Edward Smith had started telling a long rambling joke when William McMaster Murdoch cut him off with "I don't like where this is headed".

thumb_up thumb_down +11

There are a fox and a chicken and the fox eats the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's faster, a train or a bike? A horse because a cow gives milk

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How do you get Pikachu onto a bus? You ask him politely.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q: What's white, is Mel Gibson, and would kill someone if it fell out of a tree? A: Mel Gibson.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Lightning strikes 2 year old baby.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's straight and famous. Ryan Secrest I was just kidding about the stright

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why is it easy to steal candy from a baby? Because the baby is smaller, weaker and would not pose any threat.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Roses are red violets are blue Timmy what are doing with that gun?! Bang....

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you get when you cross scabies with genital warts? Krusty Krabs.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Yo mamma is so old that she lives in a retirement home for the aged, and will most likely die there in several years.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you call Batman with a knife in his chest? Dead

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Swag.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A police officer asks a witness of a murder what he witnessed. The man replies "A murder"

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Have you seen Whitney Houston's new house? Neither has she.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What happened to the boat that sank? Everyone on it died

thumb_up thumb_down +9

roses are red. vilets are blue. I'm getting hungry. make me some food...bitch.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

flashback 2010 bears vs. packers vs. bears- why did'nt the packers want to go to soldier field? because they didnt want to pass another 6 flags!

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How do you fit 100 dead babies in a box? A blender. How do you get them out? Tortilla Chips. hehehehehehe

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Haikus are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks why the long face? The horse, unable to comprehend human speech, promptly craps on the floor and leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops