what did the pizza say to the bread? nothing pizza cant talk

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Do you have to be so, you know... Open about what we are gonna do and stuff? I mean I know some people here, and you are a married man and you know.

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how many baby's does it take to clean paint your house red. depends on the quality of the crusher.

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Why did the boy eat the apple. He really likes apples.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? Someone left the gate open.

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Guy A walks into a bar and sits down beside guy B, they quickly spark up a quick conversation about golf, Guy B says "i hit the ball so hard, it soared 200 yards", Guy A quickly responds by saying "I hit your mom so hard!" Guy B responds "the jokes on you, my mom has herpes"

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what did the bannana say to the milk carton. nothing bannanas cant talk and their on the other side of the store

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Whats green and has wheels? A green car.

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What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A co-pilot

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Nero? As In Nero7? Septimus? Where you not killed during the raid? I read you got tortured and killed by your own out of mercy.

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There was this girl who suffered for her whole life and then she died. It was very liberating.

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Who hangs out with a girl all day every day while he's dating her for 4 months and still doesn't get his wiener touched. Adam claypool

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A man walks in the a bar Now he has 3 missing teeth

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What is the differnece between the chair and the pot? You can't cook in the chair.

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Why did Sidney drop her ice cream? A refrigerator fell on er

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what do you get when you combine a vampire,werewolf,and whiny girlfriend ....... the worst show in the history of the earth

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A woman walks into the kitchen to see her husband cooking dinner because gender stereotypes have been dead for years.

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What do you do if you walk outside and see your t.v. floating in the lawn in the middle of the night? Go back inside.

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Once upon a time there was an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly, everyone died. The end.

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What happened to timmy? He had downsyndrome and walked off a cliff

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Why don't you ever want to greet your friend Jack on the plane? Because your wife cheated on you with him and she is having his baby, if you were to even think about talking to Jack, you'd end up slitting his throat and throwing him off the side of the plane into a crocodile pit where they will make a feast of his body for the next couple days... So just don't greet Jack

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Three jews walked into a bar I lied, it was a gas chamber

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What stars with C, is hairy on the outside, moist on the inside and ends with T and has UN in the middle? Coconut

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Why did the bear eat the asian? It was hungry

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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