Doctor, my husband tells me he doesn't like my figure .... That's irrelevant now, you've contracted a rare blood disease and will be dead within a month.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you get when you put a frog in a paper shredder? Harshly punished by the Animal Humane Society

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A dog walk into a bar, and the bartender asks, "What"ll it be?" The dog then breaks into tears as he realizes the bartender is his father's gay husband.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

You know what they call men who make kitchen jokes? Single.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why was the boy named Bethel? He had horrible parents that wanted him to live a life of social poverty.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why was the chipmunk watching TV? Because a new Family Guy was on.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Where do you find a baby with no arms or legs? Where you left it.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What happened when the Hispanic man dropped his Wollet? He picked it up

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the lion eat food Because seaweed is green

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What is funny about 9/11. Nothing you sicko, it was a tragic day for the world.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do you get when you put your dick in a potato? A guy who is into creepy sex

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do friends and potatoes have in common? If you eat them, they will die.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the black man eat the fried chicken? He was hungry

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's 9+10? 19

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How do you keep kids off your lawn? You molest them.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

your sister has 1 boob thats funny

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what did the orange say to the other orange? we are both oranges.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do you call a black man? Black

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Guess what! What? huhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhu

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What would you call it if Justin Bieber had sex with a woman? Sex, because thats what it is.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

why was the man scared of the tree because it was shady

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the over confident jack-ass say to the hot girl, You'll do.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops