Instructions to make origami. 1.) Staple bagels to face 2.) Ask someone else to do it. 3.) Hang yourself because you are too stupid to figure it out yourself

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours Stolen propety....

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why did the hater hate? everyone else has a much better life

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A family of five sit on a bench, the bench falls the family die.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Irune. Irune who? Irune my life with all this red sand.

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Chuck Norris shaves with his fists. That's why he still has a beard.

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Q: Why did the boy have blue balls? A: because the respectable girl with high self esteem refused to give him head.

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What happened to Jillian when she walked out the door? She got hit by a bus A. Knock knock B. Whos there? A. Not Jillian

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What's worse than dropping your loli-pop? The Holocaust

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What's the same about a clown and a knife? They are both fun, except for the clown. I hate clowns.

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What does a Twihard, a Brony, a Belieber and a Gleek all have in common? They all ruin the Internet.

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The last person on Earth is sitting home alone when suddenly there is a knock at the door. Knock knock Who's there? *silence* Damn this joke got creepy...

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If life throws you lemons, get under some shelter so you don't get pelted by flying fruit and worry about making lemonade later.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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Roses are red Violets are purple. I just realized that nothing rhymes with "Purple".

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"bus driver pressed the horn at my mum and she stuck a finger up at him " Not the first time she's got the horn and shoved a finger up

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Why'd the Squirrel fall out of the tree? Cause it was dead

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Whats black and flys out of a car? Pupies stuffed in a bag.

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A: Where does a cow go on the weekends? B: To the mooooovies? A: No, to the slaughterhouse.

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What does it take to shit in a shower?? To choke on a whambar and be 90 kgs!

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An alcoholic walks into a bar, but then realises he's ruining his family so he calls the rehab

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How do you put your babysitter in jail? Kill your kid on her shift.

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A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The Mexican; the black man had too much alcohol and the Mexican was the designated driver.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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