How do you make a sandwich? Go into the kitchen and make a sandwich.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Roses are red. Violets are violet.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What did the white man say to the black man? Nice Pants

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why couldn'nt Sally swing on the swing? Because Sally was a carrot

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Jennifer Kim... having a boyfriend!

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What did the doctor say to the other doctor? Nothing. I killed them both with a fire axe and proceeded to kill all the patients in the hospital.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

How many cops does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they just beat the night since its black

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What does the blond say when she walks out of the salon Nothing, she is hit by a car, and promptly goes into a coma and hasnt said anything since

thumb_up thumb_down -27

An anti-joke

thumb_up thumb_down -27

It's bright in here *puts on? sunglasses* Ahhh, that's better...

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What did the old women do when she found her husband dead? She had a heart attack and died as well.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? Glasses

thumb_up thumb_down -27

And so he penguin said, The is my most casual outfit!" HAAAW

thumb_up thumb_down -29

wanna hear a joke? i dont like kids wanna hear a lie? im typing with two hands wanna hear a another? my hand isnt on my weiner

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Knock, knock. Come in.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Wanna hear a joke? Womens rights ;) Wanna hear another joke? Too bad i'm not gonna tell you

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Q: What do you say when you see your T.V. floating at night? A: That's so frickin awesome

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Are you antijoke.com. Because you are a faggot.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why did the plane crash? Chuck Norris was sitting in it, and thus his weight was countless times larger than the lift force of the plane.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? I don't hammer the watermon

thumb_up thumb_down -31

A classic (apologies if it's been posted before): A woman was riding the bus home after a day of shopping. Suddenly she jumped up, shouting "may aspirins! My aspirins!" The driver replied: "You probably left them on the counter at the drugstore."

thumb_up thumb_down -31

A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. One rainy night an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them out for drinks. The friends had a wonderful trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What did the poor family eat for thanksgiving? Food

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops