Teacher: Why did you fail this test? Student: Because the hamster that gives energy to my brain just died.

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What scares little children and befriends their parents? A clown

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What does a Somalian want for Christmas? Nothing hes Sunni Muslim and does not celebrate Christmas

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wanna hear a joke? womans rights

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Did you know Helen Keller had a tree house? Niether did she

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my ilkshake brings all the boys in the yard. and the local health inspector's like , have you got a permit to be selling dairy beverages from a home based business?

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a man checks his mypsace

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How do you save stop your soulmate from dying of cancer? Shoot them on the head.

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What's black and hanging on a tree in my backyard? Blackberries.

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What was the last thing that went into the head of the space pilot of the Challenger shuttle right before it crashed? He was probably thinking about his wife and family...

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[Insert anti-joke here]

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One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMMBBBWWAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

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roses are red violets are blue i'm chinese and i don't know a joke pickle.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, I stabbed someone in my garden, There's blood everywhere

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What's the difference between Harry Potter and a Jew? Harry made it out the chamber.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimer's And add extra pepperoni

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A fish walked into a bar. Actually it didn't, since fish can't walk.

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Do not be unreasonable now, as for the twenty five million dollars, it is the least I can do, but if we cannot agree upon acting with some reason and dignity, as refraining from insults, then no conflict will ever be solved... ...I will send you my contact information shortly, expect the money within the week, three or four days tops.

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So a crippled guy rolls into a bar..

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Why is red? He was just murmured by a phycopath.

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What did the man say to the prostitute? Can I pay you to come with me to a cheap motel and partake in sexual intercourse with me?

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what did the man say to then other man when he said a joke, "Ha"

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Q: What happened to the monkey when he jumped off the tree. A: He died Q: Why did the second monkey jump off of the tree A: He was attatched to the first monkey Q: Why did the third monkey jump off the tree A: Peer Pressure

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Adolf Hitler.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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