Whats worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse then two bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse then the holocaust? Three bee stings.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q Why did the chicken cross the road? A Because it couldn't fly

thumb_up thumb_down +2

"I'm terrible at writing jokes." -80% of the people on here.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call a black guy doing community service? Someone who wanted to give back. Stop being racist.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's grammatically incorrect about this sentence? Nothing. I lied.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How many women can fit on a bus? It depends on the size of the bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A cow and a whale are swimming in the sea when they both realize this is Vietnam and they were really chimps

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Roses are red,Violets are blue, Who the hell are you,Get the hell away

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Well, it all depends on the size of the bathtub.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

I once shot an elephant in my pajamas. I suffer from a debilitating sleep disorder.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

When life gives you lemons, you probably just found lemons.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

three white men are running after a black man,, the black man is winning the race

thumb_up thumb_down +2

There once was a mam from Peru He dreamed he was eating a shoe It wasn't... It was a goat

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Little boy: Daddy, daddy, I know what i want for Christmas! Dad: Oh really? and whats that? Little boy: I want a bicycle! Dad: Why my son? You are already on a wheelchair...

thumb_up thumb_down +2

(Mortal Kombat Annihilation) Princess Kitana: "Mother, you're alive" Sindel: "Too bad you, will die" (Troll 2) "They're eating her. And then they're gonna me. Oh my gawwwwwwwwd." (The Room) Johnny: I did not hit her, it's not true! It's bullshitt! I did not hit her! [throws water bottle] Johnny: I did *not*. Oh hi, Mark. Mark: Oh, hey Johnny, what's up?

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the kitty say when it's owner called him over? Nothing. It's owner killed him.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Where do you find a dead hooker? where you left her.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Knock knock Who's there Your Mother Come in

thumb_up thumb_down +2

was gonna write a really funny "anti-joke" about two dogs and some spagetti but decided instead to tell you about how hard my life is and how much i hate getting up in the morning and just keep you wondering about the spaggetti and the dogs while i kill myself and it all a sudden makes sense as the two dogs are eating my shattered brain that looks like spaggetti wich leaves me wondering , am i spelling spaggetti right?

thumb_up thumb_down +2

what's hotter than my cousin's girlfriend? I don't know. she's remarkably hot. like, one of the hottest people I personally know.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the chicken cross the road? It had gotten out of its coop.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Jack just got his new yellow bicycle. His dad got it for his 12th anniversary. Jack was ecstatic to ride it down his street for the first time. He immediately called his friends Paul and Erick and went for his first ride. The neighbors were in AWE when they saw Jack taking off on his new ride. That day the three friends had one of the best day of their young lives, they went up to the lake, had some peanut ice cream and made fun of Alexia. Jack was in love with his new bike and euphoric that they were reunited and did all their favorite things with an incredible amount of passion. Erick hated his new bike.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Two muffins are in an oven one muffin says to the other muffin "It's hot in here" the other muffin says "Holy crap a talking muffin".

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops