Q: Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Getting mauled by a pack of hungry wolves

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What's the difference between a sewer pipe and a French fry? A lot

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

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women are like buddhist shrines, you don't piss on them

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What did the cat say to the dog? Meow.

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whats black and white and black and white and black and white? a penguin rolling down a hill whats black and white and laughing? the penguin that pushed him

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¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯ ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ _________________________________________ That's a road. Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot that made this joke, me. And what did the idiot do? He ate it with barley. There was food poisoning. Where did the idiot's vomit go? In yo poo.

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What's the difference between ten dead babies and a Ferrari? There's no Ferrari in my garage.

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Pick a number between 2 and 8. Now multiply that number by 9. Now add the 2 digits of that answer together. (example 18 is 1+8) Now subtract that answer number by 5. Now choose the letter below that corresponds to that answer. 1 = A 2 = B 3 = C 4 = D 5 = E 6 = F Now pick a country that starts with that letter. Now pick an animal where the first letter of the animals name is the last letter of the country's name. Now think of a color where the first letter of the colors name is the last letter of the animals name. - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Are you thinking of an orange kangaroo from Denmark?

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Why are women such horrible drivers? Their hair gets in the way.

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Chuck Norris is so strong, he can probably lift more than 80 pounds

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A Muslim walks into a bar He immediatley turns around and leaves as his religious beliefs forbid consumption of alcoholic beverages.

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Why could susan not get up? Because her limbs were hacked off by a African militia group.

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A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all on a deserted island with no food or water. The redhead decides to try and swim to safety, but after a few hours of swimming she becomes to tired to carry on and drowns. After knowing their friend died, the two other women decide that swimming is not a viable option for rescue, so they decide to stay on the island. A few days later a search party rescues them.

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Were do seamen live under the sea? A submarine!

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What do you call an arab with a beard? How cares what his name is just shoot him!

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What did one door say to the other door? Nothing, cause doors don't talk.

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Thats the magic of Moral Man, I do not make people my bitches, they curl up and do it all for me. Moral: HEEEEEY BITCHEEEEEES! WAZZAAAAP!

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Why can't basketball players play hockey? Because hockey and basketball season occur at the same time.

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Why couldnt the man stop the car rolling down the hill? Because he had no legs.

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Q: Why couldn't the little girl ride a bike? A: Because she didn't have legs.

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Why did the Little girl fell off the swing? A: Because she had no arms. And why did she fell again? A: Because her parents laugh about it and ride her again.

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Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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