What's the difference between a black man and a bench? The bench is an object and the black man is a human being.

How do you get your lawyer to shut up. Hit him with a bat.

what do u call a 50 yr old man at disneyland a rapist

What do you call a deer that has no eyes? I have no eyedeer

What do you call an old man in his underwear with a bag of pepper on his back while licking pebbles off the sidewalk? Senile.

I got stopped for speeding the other day. The policeman said I had to pay a £50 fine. I was gutted. However, later that night I had amazing sex with my wife, which helped me to take my mind off things a bit.

If i wanted your 2 cents i'd rob you

why did the baby die? It was hit by a bus and then raped by a seal.

What do you call an animal killed on the side of the road? A false accusation towards an inanimate object that has no other purpose then providing a safe and smooth ride for drives all around the world.

What did the lampshade say to the other lampshade? Nothing they sat in silence

Keith figured gasoline burns, doesn't it? He was wrong.

What do Lebron James and Bill Murray have in common? They are both black basketball players. Except for bill murray

What's better than winning a gold medal at the paralympics? Winning two gold medals.

And so the baseball says to the tractor........ Your not my dad

A handicapped man walks into a bar...

What did I say to the joke? What? Correct.

If u give brandon a stick he will most likely poke u

I ounce had a parrot it talked buy never said im hungry so it died

How do you make a baby stop crying? You throw it out the window.

So three Irish guys walk out of a bar

why did the jockey lose the horse race? he mistook his horse for Sara Jessica Parker

how do u get the baby to stop choking? take ur dick out of its mouth!!!

What's faster than a Mexican running down the street with your TV? An airplane

wat did one chicken say to the other bock bock

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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