what did i get my mom for her birthday? Nothing im selfish

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A Chinese man fails a math test

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a dyslexic man walked his god.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Sorry, wrong house.

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Q: Why was little Timmy afraid of clowns? A: The one at his birthday party killed his parents.

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This is an anti-joke. It is not funny because "anti" means the opposite of something.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's dog? Neither has anyone else, because it ran away yesterday, and was most likely hit by a car.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have said two factual statements.

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Why did your mom fall off the swing? I shot him.

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Roses are nice, Violets are glorious, Try not to scare, Oscar Pistorius.

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Betty White's wrinkly ass skin.

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why did the man fall down? because he was shot.

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What's worse than a papercut? why do you insist on asking me these questions?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Henry threw it well.

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One day a black guy bought some fried chicken. The clerk said: Lol you guys always eat chicken! Lol said the black guy, yeah I am here a lot. Clerk: No I meant your kind of you know... I KNOW WHAT? Clerk: You guys at the studio next door! Oh, yeah, lol I almost thought you meant my skin color! Clerk: You fucking Negroes always thinking we are racist...

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What's worse than an arrow to the knee? -A bullet in the head.

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One day a kid said to his mom: "Mom, I painted the bed sheets with your lipstick". So his mom got mad.

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whats worse than a baby in a dumpster? A baby in ten dumpsters.

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How do you get an elephant in the fridge in three moves open the door, put it in, close the door How do you put an giraffe in the fridge in four moves open the door, take out the elephant, put the giraffe in, and close the door

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What's long, hard, and in my pants? The SAT's... I lied about it being in my pants.

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What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

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What do you call someone who is bad at hand eye co-ordination? Dispraxic

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What did the blond say to the other blond? "I like your shoes."

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Why did Visellet stop eating cherries? Because she choked on a pit and died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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