A fat man walks into a gym, and comes out fatter

What do you call a horny horse? A unicorn.

whats big and can vibrate after you turn it on? A washing machine.

How do you find your way out of the impossible maze? You don't.

Did you hear about the circus fire? Yes, apparently there were no casualties but all their props and equipment were destroyed, which will set the company back financially, even with the insurance.

Whats the same between an elephant and a grape? They're both purple except for the elephant

Whats the difference between wayne rooney and shrek? Well, one, shrek is fictional. Two if he was fictional,he is green. Wayne rooney is not green. Three wayne rooney plays for a football team, surely shrek has no idea what football is. The list goes on.

A Irish leaves and bump in to a really tall the Irish sorry boss

why did the chicken cross the road? who cares?

I wumbo, you wumbo, he, she, wumbo, wumbology the study of wumbo

What did the black man see when he looked in the mirror? His reflection.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was suicidal.

What did jimmy say when his brother had been mean to him all day and he was about to get a straw and his brother took the last one? That was the last straw!

Officer i'm dot nrunk, beriously you gotta selieve me!

I did it. the Bulls fan Took a few hours on Microsoft word. then I copy and pasted it on this!

What did the jewish man say to the Irish guy at the bar? Are you Irish?

What did the mother of the boy with cancer say on his birthday? - Happy Birthday, too bad you still have cancer.

What did the mental patient say to the apple? She didn't say anything because she was a catatonic schizophrenic.

Why did the fat ugly bald Jewish man go to the bank? He needed to take out some cash because he was going out for lunch at a highly recommended restaurant.

Why did the man leave anti-joke.com? Because he realized that it was time for dinner and the ham was burning.

why are there so many peadofiles in the world? sexy kids.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

When the world ends what would be the death toll It would be unknown since every one would be around to calculate it

Knock Knock. Who's There? Orange. Orange Who? No, this is Homeland Security. We have raised the current terrorism threat level to Orange, which means there is a high risk of terrorist attacks. Please report any suspicious behavior.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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