Why did the boy fall off the swing?

Why didn't Michael J. Fox feel the Virginia earthquake? He was on vacation in Maui.

deez nuts

Fred: says hi Bob: says shut up why the hell do you have to be so rude!!! Fred:thankyou ob thats better

What`s the best part about twenty-three year olds? there are twenty of them

Q:What's brown and tastes like shit? A:Shit

what did the obese kid get for chistmas? an athsma attack ,which led to death.

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Why did the blonde's parents take away her car? She didn't pay for half the insurance like she said she would.

What did Emmanuel Frimpong say to George Elokobi? you sir, are DENCH

A rabbi and a priest walk into a bar and order two beers

What do you call a Muslim man flying a plane? The pilot.

once upon a time there was a chicken, it crossed a road however unlikely this chicken has become famed for its crossing and will be hailed for eternity. through the chickens actions thus the first anti joke was born

roses are red , violets are blue, lick my dick , or lick my dick

What's black and white and red all over? A dead penguin

a horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "Why the long face?" Then the horse left because that question is racist to horses.

What do you call a cow painted in red a cat ( PS : i lied about the cow + the paint ! )

why are some people black? Because god decided there needs to be different people in the world therefore none are congruent

awkward moment when someone pretends to be Mr. Bear and stuffs up his own joke

My wife's star sign was Cancer and its quite ironic how she died really... She was attacked by a giant crab.

Dr.Octagonapus.... BLAAAAAArGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Jackalope :)

—Conversation started today— My God, why have you forsaken me? Seen 6:00 PM

Did you hear about the guy who had his head chopped off? He's dead.

A man walks out of a bar. He didn't bring his driver's license, but managed to do a grand theft auto and unfortunately, crashed on the way home beacuse of a tree. Also, killed 12 people by car

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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