Koolaid is red, Poweraid is blue, Gatorade is yellow, My urine is brown... looks like i have a bladder infection.

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

how do you get a dog to stop barking? you hit it with a stick.

What' worse than random Holocaust jokes? The Holocaust

What did the biker do when he heard about Kony 2012? He became a social activist and did his part by contributing to the cause.

what did i get my mom for her birthday? Nothing im selfish

Yes

Why can't Stevie Wonder read? Clearly the only answer is because he's blind

Whats Brown, Long and is on every black man? Legs

Why was the little boy hit by a bus? I pushed him

A man and a six year old boy are walking along a path through the woods on a moonless night. "Gee mister, I'm scared!" says the boy. "You're scared?" says the man. "I have to walk back alone!"

My ex wife looks like a pitbull.

Why did the monkey eat the banana? Because it was sexually confused

Allah walked into AK Bar

I guy goes into a coffee shop and says I'll have a coffee and a danish. The clerk says we're all out of danish. The guy says I'll just have the danish then.

A working black man, Santa, and the Easter Bunny where walking down the street and find a penny, who picks it up? The working black man, Santa and the Easter Bunny take no payment for their work.

Wanna hear the orphan joke knock knock who's there? not you parents

Three friends were walking to school, they all looked in front of them and ran away. What did they see? A 200 ft dragon eating their school.

I never made a mistake. I thought i did once but i was mistaken

What is green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree and onto your head, it will kill you? A pool table.

Q. What's long and hard and full of seamen? A. A penis. Oops, I misspelled "semen". Sorry. Also, to clarify, this doesn't describe the normal state of the average penis. Usually they are flaccid, and they can only be said to be "full of semen" at the exact moment of ejaculation.

A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor performs the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

An over weight person is diagnosed with anorexia they used to be fatter

quiz is to quizzicle as test is to test___.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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