What did the man with candy say to the little boy? I have Candy.

Why did the dinosaur rent a DVD in Redbox about a sex? Because he didn't own a Blu-Ray player.

Two Mexicans were sitting in the back of a car. They were carpooling to save gas.

What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend........... Wiped his ass

For 10 cents a day you can feed an African...they eat pennies.

Once upon a time, your dog got hit by a car this morning

Why was the little boy hit by a bus? I pushed him

Q.How do you get a dog to meow ? A. Put the dog in the freezer overnight . . Get a chainsaw and run it along his back in the morning . " Meowrrrr..."

KANE AUDITIONS FOR BRITAINS GOT TALENT SIMON COWEL REAPES HIM

Why was the woman worried? She was coughing up blood

A man came home from work and said to his wife im going to kill u

Q: Why did the plane crash? A: Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Your mamma's so fat she has been called morbitally obese

what did the penguin use as a napkin? a napkin

Did you hear about the dyslexic atheist that doesn't believe in god? His disorder has no effect on his belief system.

'How do you make a plumber cry? Buy him a belt for Christmas.

If polar bears were pink they'd be very easy to find

I started a pottery course where the two instructors looked like Demi Moore and Patrick Swayze. The only other student looked like Whooping Goldberg. This teacher to student ratio proved invaluable as I am hoping to make a living as an artist and really appreciated all the extra attention.

what did the panda say to the poachers? please stop killing my family.

Why was the Asian woman late for work? She was raped.

FAMOUS DUDE:SWAG! Thank you, thank yo- HEY NO FLASH PHOTOGRAPHY, NO YOU CANT HAVE MY-KABOOM AUDIENCE: . . . YAY CLAP CLAP CLAP.

I'm Donald Trump! Wump wump wump! What's good for the goose Is good for the gander I'm Donald Trump!

A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His family receives the news and become the talk of the town. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

Why did the computer explode into a million peices? It was thrown off the Empire State building.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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