i dont care if you rate me or not

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

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What is the difference between a Homosexual and a Heterosexual? They are both Black.

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What has a skinny head and specky? Josh Moran.

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Turkey Balls

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Knock knock. Who's there? Ryan. Ryan who? Ryan Seacrest.

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What does a dog in a microwave look like? You tell me, I normally close my eyes when I masturbate ?_?

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why did the little girl throw a clock out of the window? because she wanted to see time fly

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A homophobic man walks into a bar and the bartender asks: "what can I get for ya?" the man replies: "shut up gaylord"

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What do you call a successful black man who owns millions? Either a criminal or a fictional character.

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Wanna hear a joke? Womens rights ;) Wanna hear another joke? Too bad i'm not gonna tell you

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What did the traffic light say to the car? Bye.

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Are we in Tennessee? Because I recently saw on the side of the road that it was 10 miles to Memphis.

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Knock, knock. Come in.

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do you know cadbury choclate buttons? yeah, you know the white ones come out now, do you why? so the black kids can get there face dirty too

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what's inflation? a hollow cost.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Not only did 7 have that intimidating look to him, but 6 had recently found out that he was a well known mob boss who also went by the name of Lucky Seven. he was in charge of a gang called The Prime Numbers. They had been terrorizing 6's city for sometime now, whether it was stealing, mugging, or even killing or vandalism. 6 sure had a lot to fear, but he knew things might turn out well, as 6 had a great ability to try his best and do what he believed in: Justice

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Why does the girl continue to cry repetently everyday? Because she found out she was diagnosed with terminal cancer.

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There is two guys named tard and retard on a boat in shallow water. they both fall off. Who gets back up onto the boat? - Obviously Tard because ur dealing with a retard here.

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What is blue and has wheels? Grass- I lied about the colour and the wheels.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

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Q: What's the difference between a Boyscout and a Jew? A: Boyscouts come home from camp.

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Your mama so fat she often lays awake at night wondering if you father is happy with their sex life. He isn't.

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Whats white, fat, and looks like a horse? An albino horse who apparently has a high chance of diabetes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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