A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a whiskey sour and a mop.

Why did Suzy fall of the swing? She didn't have arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzy.

He who laughs last gathers no moss.

What's the difference between a Boy Scout and a Jew? One comes back from camp.

Ah, sorry for my failed attempt at being a witty. Yes, it has been a long day, or so the saying goes.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

Knock Knock Who's there? Max. Max who? Max who starts his greeting with,  "In accordance with Megan's law"  

No it doesnt..

Do you know what hurts? An abortion.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's house? No. Well, neither has he

An atom walks into a bar. Did it grow legs?

Haiku's are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Refrigorator

Damn, I was gonna do my laundry but Amanda Todd drank all my bleach

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

whats the difference between a black man and a cat? you dont run from a cat

Like this if you want people to stop asking to have their jokes liked.

I've got a tip for the ladies. Or if you like I can put the whole thing

Know what im sayin'? No but im wearing pants

Man 1: my wife has lovley perfume. She smells like a peppermint cream. Man 2: Yeah, I know, I spent eight hours shagging her last night.

I Couldn't afford a hair cut... so i purpposely contracted HIV

Luke, I am your father... Uh... Okay, thats chill, so uh, is my last name Vader or somthing? No son, my name is Anakin Skyw... NOOOOOOOOOOO THATS IMPOSSIBLE!

How many Soviet Russians does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, in Soviet Russia, light bulbs are an unavailable commodity because the tyrannical government has called for a ban on unnatural illumination. A fact which is not lost on Mikhail, the light bulb maker whose wife died because his lack of business caused him to miss payments on his hospital bills.

why was the 6 afraid of the 7? because 7 was a registered 6 offender.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To go home and beat his wife

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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