How many dyslexic people does it take to ruin Christmas? One, because they murdered you mother on your birthday.

Q. What did the woman use for vaginal medication? A. Standard Strength Vagisil.

why didnt the guy go to work one morning he died in a car accident

a potato a chicken and a rooster ate a cat and you just wasted your time

How do you stop a baby from crawling circles? You nail it's other hand to the floor too

A person affected by Alzheimer's is asked a knock knock question- Knock Knock Who's there? Boo Wait what are we doing again?

Knock Knock, Who's there? Duck, Duck who? Duck Sandwich

How do you put 100 kids on a girls face ? skeet

What do you call a joke that isnt funny? This one.

how much fish could a chicken

Why was the cancer patient often bullied by his peers? Because he happened to be an extremely bad person. He often annoyed people, was intransigent and often aggravated those around him causing them to bully him.

Why was the little girl crying? Because she was hanging upside down from an oak tree.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Im a Jew, Fart yourself.

Jack and Jill went up the hill....Just kidding, it was only Jill. Jack had no legs

Why did Little Timmy eat Smarties before school? Because he was hungry.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered SIX offender

Reality is often boring. TV is often bad for you. Reality TV is boring AND bad for you.

What do I hate? people

Why was the black man running? He has to stay fit for the army.

Why did the girl fall off the swings? -because she had no arms

What's the difference between a piano and a fish? A piano is an instrument, fish is an animal

Why did the black guy die... Herpees he didn't practice safe sex

Why is Michael Jackson bad at chess ? Because he is dead.

One day Jesus said to John, " come forth and recieve everlasting life." Sadly John came in fifth and won a toaster.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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