Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms and she was blind.

Why is Joel always with Jamie? Because her incorrectly positioned eyes prevent her from seeing the true Joel.

what do you call your mama at the gas station

what did the black man say to the Muslim? "you the bomb"!

What name do you call a woman who is pregnant? Her first name.

Why did the duck cross the road? It followed the chicken.

Q: What can a black man do that a llama can't? A: Walk

A seal walks into a club, It proceeds to maul customers and then makes its way back to the ocean where it lives.

Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. Does it really matter?

I don't mind gays unless they shove it down people's throats.

Timmy eats 32 cookies and eats 30 of them. What does he have? Type 2 Diabetes.

Two polar bears, oddly enough, are sitting in a bathtub. One of them asks "Could you pass the soap?" The other obliges and gives him the soap.

A black man walks into a bank with a gun. He then clocks in and takes duty because he is a security guard at the bank.

What did the Atheist say in church? His best friend's eulogy.

A blonde, a brunette and a red head are having a discussion on current issues. The brunette says she would like to see improvements in the environment. The red head says she would like to see the economy prosper. The blonde says she has to take a poop.

What did one Black college student say to another? What is your major?

Q: A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? A:They both take turns, because they are driving across the country and it would be hard for one of them to drive the entire way.

What do you get when you put a pig in an oven? A dead pig.

whats sad about 4 black people in a cadalic fallign over a cliff? it wasnt there car

numbers just make the funniest antijokes

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." Then there is silence and a gun shot is heard. Back on the phone the guy says "I shot in the air and my friend heard it and moved. I think he's still alive." The operator says "Good that means he's still breathing and he's not dead."

Q why was John bullied A Becuase he told kids that bullying was a bad and serious problem to get them to stop bullying jimmy unfortunately Jimmy killed himself because he was bullied to much and didn't want to live.

A man walked into a pub, and enjoys of a couple off pints. Some time later he loudly asks the gentleman next to him: Do you know about this thing called Fightclub?... The bartender had to call an ambulance, you don't talk about fightclub

Why did the little girl cry when she fell off the slide? Because when she fell she hit the dirt ground, cause dust to fly into the air, he eyes started to water in response to keep her eyes from being damaged. The slide however, was taken down, too many children had been hurt while playing on it. The community is now pooling money together in order to build a new playground.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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