In Soviet Russia, you drive the car, fill it up with gas, and park it. Just like in America.

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why did the cow cross the road because pigs were not flying i had to write it hurts

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What did the aborted fetus say to the recycling bin? Nothing because it isn't capable of speaking, and it was in the dumpster

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Why did the man have a really short temper? HOW THE **** SHOULD I KNOW???

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Q. Why did the man get an email? A. Because he checked his inbox.

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An African-American is working on math problems and notices an Asian man walking by. The African American asked,"Could you help me out on these math problems?" The Asian man replied, " I have never been good at math."

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What did the snowman say to the other snowman? Do you smell carrots?

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Michael Brown

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Why did the pelican cross the road? The man did not reply because his mother recently died in a car accident while crossing the road. She also loved pelicans.

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Studies prove that bald people have no hair?.

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A couple elopes in Vegas. The next morning while eating breakfast the woman tells her husband she thinks it was a mistake, using her alcoholism as an excuse for her inability to make practical decisions. The man proceeded to cry and called his attorney to arrangea proper divorce.

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When life gives you Pure Filtered Water, Sweeteners (High Fructose Corn Syrup, Sugar), Lemon Juice from Concentrate, Less Than 0.5% of Each: Natural Flavors, Citric Acid (Provides Tartness), Modified Cornstarch, Glycerol Ester of Wood Rosin, Sodium Hexametaphosphate and Sodium Benzoate and Potassium Sorbate and Edta (to Protect Taste), Red 40 Make Lemonade.

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The man said to his wife love hurts. the wife then progressed with punching in the face.

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Why did the magician die when he tried to escape from the handcuffs underwater? Because he drowned and failed his magic trick.

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Roses are red Violets are blue This website is dumb Your mom is going to kill you

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A man walks into a bar. He is then taken to the hospital for his concussion, seeing as the bar was made of metal

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What do you call a over weight woman? Fat bitch.

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Why isn't Michael Jackson good at chess? Because he's dead.

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Your mom is so ugly she often finds it difficult attracting members of the other sex.

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Pickle

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How many Italians does it take to change a light bulb....... 1

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You know what makes me smile? Facial muscles.

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What do you call Americans Watching Canadians? Hockey

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Roger D. ASS , stops, has a ponder , and walks out of a s.t.i clinic ,without being seen

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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