What is 33 + 1? Penis

Why did Hellen Keller drive off of the cliff? Because she is a woman.

Why did the pumpkin when orange is not a letter in Spanish? Because moon shoes are der milf

Hey guess whats funny? Matthew Mcconaughey Oh wait, never mind

Women's Rights

What kind of movies do pirates like? They don't know, Somalia doesn't have much of a film industry.

Why did the chicken cross the road? You reading another one of these again?

How can you ruin someone's day? Tell them their mother has cancer. No really, I found out my mom has cancer a week ago.

what is worse than throwing a dead baby off a cliff? catching one with a pitchfork!!!!

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

A man walks into a bar and says give me a 84 bourbon, when he gets it he spits it out and says this is no 84 bourbon this is a 74 scotch, So he asks for a 68 brandy , when he gets it he spits it out again in disgust saying this isn't a 68 brandy this is a 87 whiskey!, than the old man next to him says here try this, the man says what is it?, the old man just says try it, so the man does, he spits it out and shouts this is urine!, the old man says correct, now tell me how old i am.

A jew walks into a bar. The bartender says we dont sell juice here. The jew promptly leaves, offended.

Q: a black man and a mexican are in a car. Whos driving? A: The mexican. They're going to the bookstore to get some books.

Yes

the only thing i learned in geometry is when you push two circles together it makes a titty venn diagram

What do you call a man who's being followed by 18 black guys? Dave, he's going to work and is stuck in traffic

What's black and hangs from a tree? A tire swing.

What brown and squishy? um um um um melted kit-kats

Your mamas so old. When she farted dust came out.

What is blue and has to deal with a vagina. Blue waffle you know who has that Jews But the jews got it from the gassing and the gassing got it from hitlers wifes piss but the blue waffle came from the lesbian she had sex with when she was doing her lesbian phase but the lesbian got it from her father and the father got it from his wife.

Why did the man fall off of his bike? Because he is a Sikh who was mistaken for a muslim after the events of 9/11. His neighbors for 5 years have turned on him and now are throwing rocks at him to alleviate their anger while he is biking to his minimum wage job as a janitor at the local burger king, trying to make money for a family that doesn't love him anymore

Three drunk llamas wearing sombreros are walking down the street. They walk in silence, lost in their own thoughts.

Why did the duck cross the road? Because he was tired of the publicity his friend, the chicken was getting for crossing the road that he wanted to do it himself. Halfway across the duck was wistfully hit by a car and sadly, his story is lesser known and 99% of the people in this world really don't care about him. Thumbs up if you're that 1% that shows sympathy toward the duck.

Strength of body Vs Strengh of Mind. Mind: You can lead a horse to water... Strength: Then you can force that mother*bleep* to drink all you want that *bleep* to drink! Strength of body wins, horseless victory.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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