asians have slitted eyes lol

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why do black people like watermelon? Because it good you racist bastard!

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Whats red and has wheels? An apple, I was just kidding about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Whats worst than finding a worm in your apple? Going to antijoke.com instead of anti-joke.com

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Imagine yourself in a box with no windows and no doors. How do you get out? Stop imagining.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

casey, that is all, ruddel, that is all, hi mark

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did one volcano say to the other? Nothing. Volcanoes are inanimate objects that do not possess the ability to speak.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Jacob Edwards has friends.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why are women bad drivers? -There are no roads in between the bedroom and the kitchen.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What does the Priest say to the little boy? Size doesnt matter

thumb_up thumb_down -22

a dyslecstic son seys to his mum can i have a mcdonald for tea the mum seys ye if you can spell mcdonlds and the son seys fuk that im having a kcf

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A blonde, brunette, and redhead find a cliff that is supposed to turn you into something which you exclaim upon leaping from the cliff. The brunette jumps off and exclaims: BIRD! She thus falls to her death on a ton of pointy rocks. The other two loot her corpse and walk away.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did the boy say to his father? I don't know. With the seemingly infinite number of topics that two people could discuss and the fact that both the father and son are fictional, it would be unreasonable and border edge mentally unstable for me to assume that you would know what they may or may not be talking about.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Which is heavier, a tonne of feathers or a tonne of lead? It doesn't matter when your loved ones are being torn apart by bears.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What do you call a black man in green shoes and a yellow hat ? Nothing,thats just him pursuing in his own regular casual outfit there for you would just notice him as a normal man walking around with shoes and a hat on so there is nothing to call him

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Dumb

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing, because they weren't made. Cupcakes were made instead. Sorry, Muffins.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

9

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he had heard this joke so many times that it drove him so mad that he grabbed an ice cream, stepped into the road, and was hit by a bus, purposely adding an ironic effect to his death.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

This week only, 2 for 1 misdemeanor shop lifting arrest. How can I do it? Because I can.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What would you call Martin Luther King Jr. If he was alive today? Alive

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why didn't the skeleton go to his party? Because he used to be alive and was burned to death by an overturned truck carrying chemical's so his family canceled the party to organise the funeral.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What is the difference between a person with Alzheimer's and Aids? 24!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops