Why can't Julius Caesar use a cell phone? Because he is dead.

What did the cat say to the other cat? Meow

AIDS

Q. Whats red and smells like blue paint? A. Wheres my tractor?

What do you call a mouse having sex? A spouse.

Q:what is long ,black and red but smells like poo.? A:poo from someone dying of bowel cancer.!

Dyslexic drunk died choking on his own vimto last night

XD, You must really like me Nero, do you think people have problems telling us apart here?

A girl asks a Croatian bartender for a beer, the bartender replies, 'There is no beer in this bar.'

What do you call a piece of celery with peanut butter on it? your moms dead

did you hear about the guy who got his left leg and left arm cut off? he's all right now

What's under there? I'm not falling for that one...

what kind of dog can tiptoe

why do jews like money? So they can support their family.

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead dive off a motorboat. They are sucked into the propeller and brutally disfigured instantly.

What do you call a deer that has no eyes? I have no eyedeer

Q:What did the slut have in her mouth? A: teeth.

Your moms so fat she weighs 200 kilograms

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered SIX offender

Why couldn't people tell the difference between the two twins? Because they were indentical.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why didn't the chicken cross the road?!

were did the gay guy go nowere because it was raining outside

What's the different between jelly and jam? I can't jelly my penis up your butthole

Three men stumble upon an ancient lamp in the desert. They sell it to a museum and split the profit evenly.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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