In Soviet Russia, you drive the car, fill it up with gas, and park it. Just like in America.

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A guy walked into a bar a hundred years ago and but a pint of whiskey. He is dead now.?

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Steve is getting paid $29.50 to bounce a ball Steve is getting fired monday

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what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? alot of things, worms don't taste that bad.

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''I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu.''

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What did the snowman say to the other snowman? Do you smell carrots?

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread!

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Scream went into the bar. The bartender says," Why the long face?" "..." *facepalm*

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Roses are red Violets are blue I like your mom Give me some glue

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What did the furry tweet when he went to a furry convention? A: I'm at a furry convention

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

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Billy Idol walks into a New York City Bar. He snorts lines of coke with his comrades in the bathroom and continues his night by having sex with attractive underage females

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Have you see stevie wonders house? No. Neither has he.

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There was once a Polish man who was extremely sad with life because people always made fun of him. He decided to do something about it. He sat down to contemplate the situation, and after a few hours, he thought, "I have never seen anyone making fun of Italians. So, if I start talking and behaving like them, no one will be able to make out that I am Polish and make fun of me." He went into isolation for three months and after a lot of practice, he walked confidently into a shop and said, "I am a very hungry. Give me some pepperoni and zucchini." Immediately, the man behind the counter said "Are you Polish?" This guy was taken aback and he repeated his request. The man behind the counter said, "Are you Polish or not?" This man was finally very ashamed and amazed at the shop owner's discerning ability and so he admitted to the fact after which he asked, "But how did you know?" The shopkeeper replied, "My grandmother was Polish. I could tell by your accent."

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What did the black police officer say to the white police officer? We just got a call in. Four dead children were found in an alley behind a mall.

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What did the you know what screw this I'm sick of making these stupid jokes there all the same. Hang on hang on What did the pirate do to the dog yes This style of joking is so different I'm going to be a famous comedian oh wait there's a whole bloody website full of these. O look another one and another one and another one that knife over there looks really nice right now

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Women outside of the kitchen.

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Rebecca Black walked into a stadium. There were so many seats to choose from. But, she sat down in the nearest seat she could find and enjoyed the football game.

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How do you starve a Mexican? You stick him in a secure room and deprive him of food resources

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a bigger worm in your apple.

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Who is a pussy ass bitch and is and has a chode? - Jeff Misner

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Why did the little girl pull her hair out? She didn't, It's a side-effect of the chemotherapy.

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Why didn't the condemned man seek a reprieve of his execution? He forgot.

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Jack be nimble. Jack be quick. But Jack still couldn't out run that bullet.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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