Why did the grandma stop baking cookies? Because she is an aging widow suffering from depression because her family seems to forget her existance as she barely lives day by day wilting in her 1 bedroom home.

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Hay is for horses and other hay consuming mammals.

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What do you do when your wife is about have a baby? Throw her off the balcony go into parking lot and reach into her mouth if you feel a leg stab her in the belly button untill her intestines are coming out and burn the body singing Elmo's world

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Bill: My vagina is itchy. Tom: You don't have a vagina. It was later found out that bill had a sex change and did have an itchy vagina, due to an STI. He later died of cancer.

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(Knock, knock) A: Who's there? B: Orange A: That is impossible. Oranges are inanimate objects and, therefore, cannot speak.

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what do You call a white man killing a black man? a accident

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock -Who's there Not Sarah

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why should you not shake a baby? because if it dies it wouldnt know that its parents hate them.

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "Yeah, but you make a really great sandwich!"

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What's the sound of one hand clapping? The same as two hands; just not as loud.

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How many blond girls does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1, it is a faily simple task

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Why was 6 afraid of 7 7 eight 9

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dalas rof rezilitref taerg a si citsalp. Read it from right to left.

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Your mother is so obese that she has over the recommended daily calorie intake on a regular basis.

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What happened to the homeless man at midnight? He took a shit on the ground

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What's worse than being hit with a falling brick? Being hit with many falling bricks. -ilikecrepes97

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The awkward moment when you are reading these jokes and either it's not funny or you don't get it...

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "why the long face?" The horse replies "my whole family was killed in 911... And I used the money I got from life insurance to get plastic surgery to always have a smile on my face. My doctor botched the surgery, so now my face is elongated. Even for a horse, of course."

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so a baby seal walks into a club, the bouner immedietly kicks the seal out because it is too young to be in a club and also.....itsa seal

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What did the piano say to the ice cube? Dude, get back in the freezer or you are going to melt!

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Did you hear about the kidnapping in New York? He woke up.

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whats worse than getting ran over by a car seeing your mum having sex

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it ain't easy being cheesy Max Harrison

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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