whats worse than the black death. Bieber Fever

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Why do white people not eat crackers? Cause it's cannabalism.

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When making an Anti-Joke, you click the button that says: 'I have read and agree to the terms of service' What are you called? A Liar.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Well, it all depends on the size of the bathtub.

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When life gives you lemons, you probably just found lemons.

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Roses are red,Violets are blue, Who the hell are you,Get the hell away

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A cow and a whale are swimming in the sea when they both realize this is Vietnam and they were really chimps

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

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I once shot an elephant in my pajamas. I suffer from a debilitating sleep disorder.

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Who let the dogs out? The dog's owner.

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Jack just got his new yellow bicycle. His dad got it for his 12th anniversary. Jack was ecstatic to ride it down his street for the first time. He immediately called his friends Paul and Erick and went for his first ride. The neighbors were in AWE when they saw Jack taking off on his new ride. That day the three friends had one of the best day of their young lives, they went up to the lake, had some peanut ice cream and made fun of Alexia. Jack was in love with his new bike and euphoric that they were reunited and did all their favorite things with an incredible amount of passion. Erick hated his new bike.

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Two muffins are in an oven one muffin says to the other muffin "It's hot in here" the other muffin says "Holy crap a talking muffin".

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knock knock who's there? Jehovah's witness GOOD BYE!

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Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson go camping, and pitch their tent under the stars. During the night, Holmes wakes his companion and says: 'Watson, look up at the stars, and tell me what you deduce.' Watson says: 'Someboby stole our tent.' Holmes and Watson look at each other, shrug and go back to sleep. At least the thief kept their blankets.

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An Asian girl is playing with a rubber band. She accidentally slings it into her eye, cries, and receives immediate attention from her mother.

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why did the girl ask for food? because she was hungry and hadnt eaten in days.

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Q. What did the chicken say to the buffalo? A. Nothing, this is an improbable predicament.

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Knock, Knock Whos there? Banana Banana Who? Banana i didn't say your moms dead.

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Then I contracted bronchitis from the smoke. Unfortunately I don't not have time to visit a doctor to mend this debilitation. In fact, nobody does.

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Q:Whats 2+2? A: 4

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What's a fry cook's favorite day? Saturday. It's his day off.

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What did the mexican say to the black guy? He asked if he needed some drugs. Why? He was a pharmacist.

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What did the helicopter say? Aluminum-minum-minum-minum-minum-mum-mum-mum-mum-um-um-um-um

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An English man, a German man and a Canadian man stood on the edge of a cliff. The English and German both jump off. What happens then? The Canadian says "they were serious?!" and runs away to fake his death and live the rest of his life as Frank Brown.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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