9/11 my birthday

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the fat man cross the road? Because he felt that being overweight, he had to do something about it and go to the gym.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did Marshawn Lynch say? Yeah

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: Suzy loves apples, she will do anything to get her hands on an apple. Why didn't she eat Tom's apple? A: She ate someone elses apple and then he killed her before she could get to tom's!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

roses are red, violets are blue, im a bad poet, text me. LMFAO

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

justin bieber walks into a bar, he is then kicked out because he's under age.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

-What's sad about four black guys driving off a cliff? -They were my friends.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

My grandma told me to always keep my head up and just keep going. She fell down a manhole last week and died.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Roses are red, violets are blue. This is a poem about flowers.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the terrorist get for Christmas? A bullet in his head.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

why did the girl ask for food? because she was hungry and hadnt eaten in days.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the man on the moon say? ...Im on the moon.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q:What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? A:Lick-a-lotta-pus

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why didn't the pregnant, pro-choice woman have an abortion? It was a planned pregnancy.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

I once saw a fat child eating a sandwich. I wondered what was inside.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

If little jimmy has five candy bars and he eats three, what does little jimmy have? Diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Dam. Mothers Against Dyslexia.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Roses are red , Violets are blue You little dumb ass bitch Ain't fuckin' with yoouuuuuu

thumb_up thumb_down -2

I dyed my armpit hair blue yesterday because I wanted to start a new trend. My boyfriend later broke up with me.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Guns don't kill people, books kill trees.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

An Irishman walks into a bar. He died of alcohol poisoning that day

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why was the man's foot hurting? Because he was being fed into a wood chipper

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q. How can you tell if a snake bites? A. It depends on if he walks to school or carries his lunch.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops