- Anti Joke

A duck walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, what can I get you?" He is then checked into the psychiatric ward at the local hospital, for talking to a duck.

Mickey Mouse peed on a house what color was it? It wasn't a color, or any pee for that matter. Mickey Mouse is a fictional character for children's amusement.

Q.What do you call a friend with benefits? A. a buck fuddy.

What do you call a mexican who steals toasters? A mexican toaster thief.

What do you call a horse with a missing leg Calling it names could be considered animal abuse and should be reported immediately

What do you call a cat up a tree in a party hat? A cat up a tree with a party hat

Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

A man walks into a bar and notices a twelve inch tall man playing a small piano. He asks the bartender about it. The bartender explains that the pianist has worked there for some time, mostly performing on weeknights. The bartender also tells the man that he may be suffering some vision problems, as the pianist is about 5'8" or 5'9". Some time later the man visits an optometrist and finds out he has a severe case of astigmatism.

Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. He calls the right number.

Yo mama so fat that when she jumped into a pool she displaced more water than someone who was of a normal weight

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

What's worse than 10 babies in a trashcan? One baby in 10 trashcans.

Roses are red, Violets are dead, I climbed through your window, I'm under your bed

Why do ducks fly south for the winter? because its to far to waddle

What happened to the pleasure robot he pleasured someone in the pussy

How do you stop a clown from smiling? Hit it with an axe!

What's the difference between dead babies and punching bag? No one makes jokes about punching bags.

What's the difference between a Jew and a boy scout? The boy scout comes home from camp

What's the oppicite of brown???? Something not brown.

A Jew ran into a wall with a boner. He broke his nose first.

What do you call a dolphin without a head? Dead.

I am black. And i will beat your children. At checkers. They can be the red .

1: Knock Knock? 2: Who's There? runs

Why was little Johnny crying? He is regularly raped by his father.

Why couldn't the blind man see his friend? He was behind him.

A duck walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, what can I get you?" He is then checked into the psychiatric ward at the local hospital, for talking to a duck.

Mickey Mouse peed on a house what color was it? It wasn't a color, or any pee for that matter. Mickey Mouse is a fictional character for children's amusement.

Q.What do you call a friend with benefits? A. a buck fuddy.

What do you call a mexican who steals toasters? A mexican toaster thief.

What do you call a horse with a missing leg Calling it names could be considered animal abuse and should be reported immediately

What do you call a cat up a tree in a party hat? A cat up a tree with a party hat

Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. He calls the right number.

Yo mama so fat that when she jumped into a pool she displaced more water than someone who was of a normal weight

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??

What's worse than 10 babies in a trashcan? One baby in 10 trashcans.

Roses are red, Violets are dead, I climbed through your window, I'm under your bed

Why do ducks fly south for the winter? because its to far to waddle

What happened to the pleasure robot he pleasured someone in the pussy

How do you stop a clown from smiling? Hit it with an axe!

What's the difference between dead babies and punching bag? No one makes jokes about punching bags.

What's the difference between a Jew and a boy scout? The boy scout comes home from camp

What's the oppicite of brown???? Something not brown.

A Jew ran into a wall with a boner. He broke his nose first.

What do you call a dolphin without a head? Dead.

I am black. And i will beat your children. At checkers. They can be the red .

1: Knock Knock? 2: Who's There? *runs*

Why was little Johnny crying? He is regularly raped by his father.

Why couldn't the blind man see his friend? He was behind him.

A duck walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, what can I get you?" He is then checked into the psychiatric ward at the local hospital, for talking to a duck.

Mickey Mouse peed on a house what color was it? It wasn't a color, or any pee for that matter. Mickey Mouse is a fictional character for children's amusement.

Q.What do you call a friend with benefits? A. a buck fuddy.

What do you call a mexican who steals toasters? A mexican toaster thief.

What do you call a horse with a missing leg Calling it names could be considered animal abuse and should be reported immediately

What do you call a cat up a tree in a party hat? A cat up a tree with a party hat

Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. He calls the right number.

Yo mama so fat that when she jumped into a pool she displaced more water than someone who was of a normal weight

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??

1: Knock Knock? 2: Who's There? runs