What is worse than catching someone trying to cheat by looking at your exam? Getting struck by lightning.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

How do you make an onion cry? Kill the chef.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

knock knock who's there i am dead i am dead who i am just dead u idiot!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why was the mohel touching the little boy's penis? Because that's his job!

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What do you get when you drink water? Piss.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

How do you confuse a bar tender? You ask him how tender he is.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

roses are blue violets are red and just like you they're messed up in the head

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why did Teddy eat dirt? Because he was hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A Jew, a Christian and a Muslim are on a plane to France. When they arrive in Paris one will go visit a friend who recently found inspiration in the many magical streets of the city and is in the middle of a year abroad. Another will search for a job and home to support himself and any future family that he might choose to have in the future. The last will check into a hotel and proceed to have a wonderful time seeing all the sights that Paris has to offer.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A Blonde Goes On "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire"

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why did the girl talk to her computer? Because she was Skyping with some faraway friends. Why were her friends far away? She was sent to the moon. Why was she sent to the moon? Because she tried to create eternal night.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? It depends on a variety of factors such as the size of your mouth, the amount of saliva, etc.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Grandpa loved a good joke, he died laughing. The doctor said it was a severe stroke probably brought on by smoking aggravated by high cholesterol and high blood pressure.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What did the vampire use to make tea? Hot water, a kettle, and some nice green tea leaves given to him by his great uncle for kwanza.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

This is a joke about Helen Keller. "Knock knock" "Who's there?

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was running away from a Black family reunion.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Who do u talk to when everyone is ignoring you? Nobody will talk to you so what's the point?

thumb_up thumb_down -23

In a nerd wedding they don't say "i do" They say "i accept the terms and conditions"

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What has feet, but no legs? An alien.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Don't count your eggs before you put them in a basket.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Who has two thumbs and lost them? Me but I can't really point at myself due to the lack of thumbs.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

hey whats your name Im gonna hit you so hard........ that im gonna knock your block off

thumb_up thumb_down -23

so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops