Hi... your father has testicular cancer and he will die in 2 months....

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Q: What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor ? A: The holocaust

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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An old man walks into a bar. He drinks 3 beers and dies. The bartender calls paramedics but when the police came they arrested the bartender for beating his wife. A few hours later an earthquake destroys the bar and everyone was evacuated and many were injured. The manager was driving to the scene but has a car accident with the ambulance. It was such a bad day.

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How many Jews can fit in a Volkswagen beetle? Four, although five is possible if you are not afraid of getting a ticket.

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Why did the little boy let go of his balloon? Because I was raping his face.

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Why is it funny when dogs talk ? Answer: they don't

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Q: Why do sharks live in salt water A: Because if they don't the die from blood loss because their blood-cells swell up and explode in non- salty water.

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Where's the best place to buy moon bars? Michael Toal

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do you know what Noah didn't bring on his arc? unicorns

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and 50 dead babies? Where the hell would you even find 50 dead babies? That would be really disturbing.

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a black man walks into a shop, he buys his groceries, then leaves...

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Why is water clear? Because it doesn't have a pigmentation.

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What is the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? One is fun to hit with a sledgehammer while the other is just a water melon.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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when god created an asian he said 'Crispy"

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How do you scare a black man? Burn his house down.

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Knock knock Who's there? The bank. We've come to evict you from your house.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? I don't know, why don't you go ask him?

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Hats better than a stick? A stone

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Hi im a joke i eat turtles

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You can pick your ur nose u can pick ur friends u just can't pick ur friends nose.

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What's the difference between and orange? The horse wasn't wearing a saddle.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? The police, your father just died in a boat accident.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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