Roses are red Bob is dead My name is Dave Your a microwave

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Q:Why did the dwarf shout abuse at the bus driver? A: He had anger issues, and the price of the ticket was quite unreasonable.

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Knock knock. Who's there? John. John who? John Smith.

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Q: What's blue and fuzzy? A: Blue fuzz

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Dolly Parton's bobbs are so fake that they both have silicone in them.

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What did the White lady say to the Black lady? Hello, how are you?

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Why was the man alone? Because he was tied to a tree.

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Why did little john fall off his bike? Somebody threw microwave oven at him.

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Why was 2 afraid of three Because it bigger

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why did the little girl fell off the bed? because she saw his father rape her sister after killing his mother years ago, and every time she goes to sleep, she remembers that and the images come back to haunt her

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Did you hear about the dyslexic insomniac that stayed awake all night wondering if there really is a dog?

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I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one . Though , I do have cancer .

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how do you wake up a really old man? you dont, he's probably already dead.

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How do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The refrigerator is lying on its side and the door is ripped off. The food is all over the place and the shelves are scattered around the floor. Your house will have suffered severe structural damage that insurance plan might not cover. Also there is a mortified elephant in you kitchen.

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How did the cat get outside? It fell out the window

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A black guy, a Mexican, an Arab and a white guy walk into a room and embrace cultural diversity.

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The Israeli asked the Japanese guy to open his eyes The Japanese guy said, I'm not squinting you crazy Jew. You're the one that sold me these cheap glasses.

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Why did Mr. Moseley choose to not buy crest toothpaste this month? Because your daughter got an abortion.

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Whats the difference between Megan Fox and a dead baby? Megan Fox is alive

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What's the difference between a black man and a gorilla? One is a black man and the other is a gorilla.

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Last Christmas I gave you my heart. I am still waiting for a transplant.....

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why did the chicken cross the road? he didnt.. that kinda shit never happens

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Why is it scientifically proven that even Spider-Man would be a match for Superman? Because none exist. Moral: The only Super Hero... not scientifically proven, but I exist so that makes me stronger than both of them!

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why didn't the baby cry once it came out of the womb? because it was a stillborn.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops