Knock Knock. Not home.

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Word Problem Q.John has 32 candy bars. He eats twenty eight of them. What does he have now? A. Diabetes. John has Diabetes.

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What's the worse thing O.J. Simpson has gotten away with? Running a red light

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What do you call it when an old person cuts off their fingers? Dementia

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Q: What did the floor say to the Christmas tree? A: Your balls are hanging.

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What's 1+1? 69.

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How often do you remember a dream? Well what if I told you that this is a dream go ahead pinch your arm. You probably didn't feel pain. And just incase jump out a fifth story window. Come on do it. Now if you are still reading this you are either dreaming or didn't jump out the window. Shame on you!!!!!!

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roses are red violets are red i smell my wife nows shes dead

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what's worse than waiting 45 minutes in an amusement park ride? getting your penis chopped off.

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why is your grandfather climbing up a pole? hes not

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What do you call a doctor without a head? Deceased

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To visit his mother at the hospital who is dying of cancer.

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How do you offend a black man? Call him a nigger.

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How do you get a girl to pay for food? You Rape Her

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What do you call a piece of celery with peanut butter on it? your moms dead

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Knock knock. Who's there? Not your grandma! Cause she's dead! Come to the funeral

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why don't you ask the chicken. I am sorry but I as a human being am totally incapable of understanding and communicating with chickens.

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Why did the black man get a zero on his SAT? He was up so late helping orphans with disabilities that he fell asleep during the test.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra drinks a bear and leafs .....

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whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff.

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Have u ever noticed why a Police car siren isnt as loud as an ambulance siren? Do u know why that is? Because i dont, and i would like to know because my over active and curious brain is pounding through my skull and throbbing with question and wont stop until i know the answer!

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Wanna know what a hate about instructions? I always get my dick stuck in a ceiling fan.

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Whi can't John sleep? Because he is dead!

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What did the man say to the jew? How are jew?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops