Why did the blonde die? She was slurped up by a 1,000 foot anteater.

Your mommas so stupid she put a quarter into a parking meter and waited for a gumball to drop out.

Your momma's so old, she your family should be proud to know someone who has lived such a long and full life.

Why was Sally angry? Because somebody burned all her clothes

In Soviet Russia, blonde is smart

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He did not have sufficient stability in his arm at that moment causing him to loosen his grip and drop his ice cream.

What's funnier than 100 dead babies? Everything.

How do you stop a blind kid from walking into oncoming traffic? .................to late!!!!!!!

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple.

The past, the present and the future walk into a bar. It was tense.

A bar walks into a man

How do you end a sentence

A little boy was walking down the street when a strange looking van stopped next to him and the man driving asked the little boy where he lived, where his mother was, and if he wanted a puppy because he had some in the back seat.... The boy proceeded to enter the van. The man then handed the child a puppy and promptly drove the boy home.

How many dead babies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Assuming the fact that these children are in fact deceased, it would be highly inprobable that they could perform any task. Or that they would need to see any light at all, since the point of that dark room is to keep them concealed.

A guy walks into a bar. He meets a girl and they have a great time. He calls her the next day and their relationship continues for many months. Eventually they get married and have children.

Why can't Hellen Keller have kids? Because she's dead, therefore does not possess the ability to bear children.

A Muslim walks into a bar. No-one survived the blast.

Why do people waste time reading these jokes. Because they like anti jokes.

5 black men walk into a 7-11 at midnight. They clog the all of the toilets in the mens bathroom causing them to over run.

Why did the black man die? Kidney Failure.

Why did the chicken cross the road Who the f*** let out the chicken

What's yellow and cant walk? The Sun

What is Hitler's favourite Yu-Gi-Oh card? Blue Eyes, White Dragon.

Do you know what my Granddad said to me before he kicked the bucket? He said; how far do you think I could kick this bucket? Then he died.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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